Subtitles section Play video
-
- Happy holidays, everybody.
-
Welcome to story time.
-
I'm Pear.
-
- I'm Orange
-
- And today, we'll be reading a Christmas classic,
-
"Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer."
-
You excited for this one, Orange?
-
- You bet!
-
The story of Rudolph has always been near and "deer"
-
to my heart.
-
(Orange laughs)
-
- Ugh!
-
- Ah, don't be like that.
-
You and I both know that joke absolutely "sleighed."
-
(orange laughing)
-
- Ugh, listen, dude, it's time to quit with the jokes.
-
Because I have a very important question I want to ask you.
-
You know Dasher and Dancer and Prancer and Vixen,
-
Comet and Cupid, and Donner and Blitzen.
-
But, do you recall the most famous reindeer of all?
-
- [Orange] Of course!
-
♪ Rudolph, the super-rude reindeer ♪
-
♪ Was the rudest deer of all ♪
-
- [Pear] What?
-
♪ If you did ever cross him ♪
-
♪ He would rudely dis you mom ♪
-
- [Pear] That's not how it goes.
-
♪ All of the other reindeer ♪
-
♪ Were afraid of his red, red nose ♪
-
♪ 'Cause it had weaponized powers ♪
-
♪ If he was mad, he would unload ♪
-
(record scratching)
-
- [Pear] That's enough!
-
Orange, you're ruining this holiday classic.
-
- I believe you meant to say,
-
"Enhancing this holiday classic."
-
(Orange laughs)
-
- No!
-
Now, we're gonna do this again.
-
And you're gonna sing it right, this time.
-
Got it?
-
His name is not Rudolph because he's rude.
-
Understand?
-
- Okay, fine.
-
- Good.
-
So, Orange, I'll ask you again.
-
Do you recall the most famous reindeer of all?
-
- [Orange] Heck, yeah, I do.
-
♪ Rudolph the red-nosed rain gear ♪
-
♪ Was waterproof and kept things dry ♪
-
(record scratching)
-
- [Pear] He is a reindeer!
-
Not rain gear!
-
- Oh!
-
Yeah, that makes way more sense.
-
Why the heck would a rain coat have nostrils?
-
Nobody "nose."
-
(Orange laughs)
-
- We're doing it again!
-
And this time, you're gonna do it right!
-
Got it?!
-
- Honestly, who "nose?"
-
(Orange laughs)
-
(Pear screams)
-
- Orange!
-
Do you recall the most famous reindeer of all?
-
- [Orange] You bet your buttons, I do.
-
♪ Rudolph the shed-clothes reindeer ♪
-
♪ Shed his clothes and ran 'round nude ♪
-
♪ If you were unsuspecting ♪
-
♪ He'd make sure you barfed your food ♪
-
(record scratching)
-
- [Pear] That is enough!
-
Orange, this is ridiculous!
-
Rudolph is not some nudist deer,
-
who goes around flashing people!
-
- Are you sure?
-
Isn't one of Santa's reindeer named Flasher?
-
- That's Dasher!
-
And you know it!
-
A nudist reindeer doesn't even make any sense.
-
- Of course it makes sense.
-
If there wasn't a deer running around completely naked,
-
then why do they call it "buck" naked?
-
(Orange laughs)
-
- Oh my gosh, dude!
-
- Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a story to finish.
-
♪ All of the other reindeer ♪
-
♪ Chose to wear their winter coats ♪
-
♪ They fear the next time Rudolph ♪
-
♪ Would appear and then disrobe ♪
-
♪ Then one foggy Christmas Eve ♪
-
♪ Santa came to say ♪
-
♪ Rudolph with your coat tied tight ♪
-
♪ Won't you flash the way tonight ♪
-
♪ So Rudolph, he got to flash him ♪
-
♪ 'Til someone called the P.D. ♪
-
♪ Rudolph the shed-clothes reindeer ♪
-
♪ Went down for indecency ♪
-
- [Pear] Ugh, I guess we'll see you next time.
-
Assuming story time doesn't get shut down
-
by the censors before then.
-
- [Orange] The end!
-
(Orange laughs)
-
- [Pear] Oh, that's so gross, dude!
-
(upbeat holiday music)