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  • We've all been there before: you're in love, you think everything's going great and then...

  • Um, we have to break up.

  • Well, you just lost a fan.

  • If you found yourself in this situation, I know how you feel.

  • Sorry

  • You can't eat, you can't sleep, all you can do is cry, think about your ex, what went wrong

  • And why you're such an unlovable piece of shit

  • But listen to me: you're going to be okay. Not now, not anytime soon;

  • but, eventually, and with the help of

  • friends, friends, friends, friends, friends, friends. You need your support network right now more than ever.

  • So call your friends or family and ask them to come over, or just get on the phone to talk or schedule a lunch or

  • dinner or whatever. You're gonna

  • have a lot of free time on your schedule between all the crying and crying that you're doing, and that's when you want to lean

  • on the people who love you; a lot.

  • Because that's an opportunity to process this

  • relationship without all the negative

  • spiraling that you're bound to do in your own time because your support network is gonna say really supportive things that you won't say to

  • yourself. Things like:

  • "He wasn't right for you.

  • I didn't say anything at the time, but you know we all knew you guys weren't a great match."

  • "You're amazing you're gonna find someone who understands you and appreciates you and wants to work it out."

  • "I love you. I'm so sorry this is happening."

  • "Do you want some tea?"

  • When you're not leaning on your friends, pick up old or new hobbies. You're gonna

  • have a lot of free time on your hands, as I mentioned, and a very active

  • anxious mind to occupy and I please encourage you to not make drinking, smoking, or any other unhealthy form of escapism a hobby.

  • Because I have done that before and it just prolongs your grieving process gives you a lot of bad tweets.

  • And, you know, just doesn't make you feel very good so pick up something that you love

  • but you haven't tried it in a while, or something that you've always wanted to try. With my blindside breakup,

  • I finally decided, like, I'm gonna try to cope with this in a very healthy way. And, over the last month

  • I read, like, 30 books I spent 40 hours getting reacquainted with drawing and poetry,

  • meditated twice a day for 20 minutes, took a weekly yoga class, journaled a fuck ton, time saw two therapists and a life coach;

  • Yeah, I was, it was a lot.

  • But, that said, I do know that this breakup is gonna be all you think about all the time so try to

  • understand what you're going through.

  • And, if possible, embrace it because chemically, your brain is going through the same withdrawal process as a

  • cocaine addict. This is why it hurts so bad

  • *aaaahhhAaaaaAHAHAhhAAAA*

  • Oh God, oh

  • Grieving and crying

  • suck ass, but they're a very natural part of the process. And I know this is not what anyone wants to hear right now,

  • it's not what I wanted to hear, but try to take this opportunity as

  • something good to transform yourself.

  • You know, my friend told me to, like, try to make this breakup the best thing that ever happened to me.

  • And, I know, you like hate them for saying it,

  • but at the same time if you try to work towards making that statement true

  • you take a lot of actions in your life that are really healthy and good for you, because you get to choose how to

  • handle this breakup, and how you're gonna transform from it.

  • So, are you gonna be a victim and be like really sad? Longer than necessary, because grieving is important;

  • Or, are you gonna get the best revenge

  • possible by just leveling the fuck up as a person and really empowering yourself and being the most successful greatest version of yourself possible?

  • I'm Anna Akana. I'm very sorry that you're hurting and also if you do not know Dodie. Please check her out

  • She's an amazing singer/songwriter and an advocate of mental health awareness

  • Her book is really great for those of you who have depression. It helped me a lot, and also helped me with my breakup.

  • She's just fantastic, and if you need a good cry listen to her song '6/10.'

  • which I love. All right, stay right here for a sponsored message. *in a sad voice* I wanna say thank you to Squarespace for sponsoring today's episode.

  • Squarespace offers beautiful award-winning templates not to mention an all-in-one platform,

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  • They also have 24-hour customer service if you're, like, really sad in the middle of the night

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  • I don't have a domain.

  • They're gonna for any kind of website: like if you're an artist or photographer,

  • you're looking for the love of your life, still like maybe they're still out there

  • I hope they really are. You can go to Squarespace.com and start your free trial today.

  • And you can use the offer code anna up for 10% off at checkout.

We've all been there before: you're in love, you think everything's going great and then...

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B1 breakup grieving squarespace dodie process love

dealing with a break up ft dodie

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    林宜悉 posted on 2020/12/16
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