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  • before I moved to Japan.

  • I used to think, What if I don't make any friends?

  • What of them alone?

  • And nobody will be there to help me.

  • What if I end up hating Japan and missing my friends and family back home?

  • I'm sure some of you are thinking the same exact things if you plan on moving to a new city or on the other side of the world.

  • But trust me when I say people who live here always tend to figure this part out.

  • Good morning, everybody.

  • My hair is wet and I need thio Dry it, But I'm about to do my makeup because I am make bliss.

  • This video is sponsored by Rosetta Stone.

  • I have been partnered with them for a while now, and I believe in them because one I worked as an SL assistant language teacher, and that's what we used for the kids who were learning English.

  • The language program is great.

  • Kids air ableto learn through context because a lot of language programs have the English next to it, and for Rosetta Stone, it's opposite.

  • They kind of show you pictures and then you kind of connect the two It's a very good for the brain.

  • It's very good exercise for the brain.

  • That's how kids and how Children learn is through context.

  • When you look at a picture, you can connect the language with the picture.

  • It's a very different system.

  • That's why I really like Rosetta Stone.

  • I also really like how they put it together and how it looks.

  • It's very colorful.

  • It's very fun, especially if you have kids.

  • I feel like it's great for kids, but it's also great for adults because they have different levels.

  • Beginners, intermediate and advanced.

  • Rosetta Stone just aligns with me, and I've used it before.

  • I used it with my students when I was a teacher back in the U.

  • S.

  • And its been a leading language program for 25 years.

  • More than 25 years now, they also have now an option for a language tutor.

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  • But it's only for a couple of days, so buy it now.

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  • And I love when I can give you a gift, and I could give you some discounts on anything that you purchased when I was little.

  • Me, a 23 years old, moving to a new country.

  • I was pessimistic about a lot of things When something didn't go right or I couldn't fit in.

  • I just didn't think it was fair.

  • I kept forcing it, trying to make everything happen and control certain scenarios in my life, and I kept saying even out loud.

  • I can't make friends living abroad.

  • It's too hard.

  • It's not easy.

  • This sucks.

  • Everyone is always too busy, but what I was really doing was blocking myself from meeting the right people and making changes to my lifestyle to attract the right crowd.

  • In other words, I was trying way too hard.

  • I, of course, also had a lot of limiting beliefs surrounding friendships I needed to tackle while I was here.

  • So I get you.

  • It's not easy, but believe me when I say you attract when you stop trying and start living, there are police Busses and I don't know why.

  • Hello, everyone I'm in.

  • How did juku Right now it's been a really long I forgot how to socialize.

  • I swear to God, I've been spending so much time with my husband.

  • I love my husband of death, but I'm actually super excited.

  • Let's go out with other people.

  • I met a new friend in quarantine because guess what?

  • Social media is gold for meeting new people and connected.

  • I didn't have a lot of what we have now in 2020 to connect.

  • Eight others were here at Ah, burrito place.

  • That I used to go to and coming back here is really strange because everything is closed except for this place, which I'm actually surprised that it's still open places to be super colorful and open.

  • Lots of people, even the normal how to do this tree is just so empty.

  • It's just really strange to see.

  • So there's a meet up app faced with groups instagram and so much more.

  • But besides that, I met a lot of people through co workers putting yourself out there to meet us.

  • Many people, it's possible, even if they aren't the type you'd hang out with is so necessary to learn what type of community aligns with you and who you are as a person.

  • This is like massive.

  • It wasn't always some flowers and rainbows.

  • People came and people went.

  • I have a hard time with that as well.

  • And sometimes I still dio I never had the big cotton Candies sugar all over her.

  • Mom, we're in.

  • How did you go with no tourists?

  • No.

  • Usually you can't walk down the street.

  • So there are tourists from out of town.

  • Tourists that came from other prefectures are here.

  • It's interesting.

  • It's weird to see.

  • I can see you.

  • All right.

  • So we're at a shop that has, like, a bunch of different options you can choose from.

  • So, like you can click on the wall and then you confined your color.

  • E don't know how this all works.

  • Technology is an expanded world these days This'll unique low uses screens instead of mannequins To help you choose your outfits.

  • Just click on what you like.

  • Choose peace.

  • You like the color and it will show you where the item is in the store.

  • Incredible.

  • Right?

  • Hold Mall of Unico Unico Unico Unico I'm sure you're wondering Well, what about making Japanese friends in Tokyo?

  • I found it quite difficult.

  • That's everyone leaves such a busy life here in Nagoya I had a massive amount of Japanese friends but when I moved here, it wasn't easy anymore.

  • E have a whole video on that in the link below Eataly Italy.

  • I get it.

  • Italy.

  • Wow!

  • Text me Okay away, right?

  • We just arrived at the shrine and there's a bunch of police officers here.

  • We have no idea why.

  • It looks like there's some kind of event here, but I don't understand anyway, I don't know what's going on here, but this is kind of cool.

  • The thing is, I wanted so badly to fit in anywhere.

  • When I moved here, I wanted a family to replace my family back home.

  • But the more I forced it, the more I brought in a group of friends that talk drama and not goals.

  • Onley stayed in Japan for a short time.

  • Judged me made me feel bad for not being perfect in Japanese or an English teacher in Japan.

  • I met people who pressured me to go out all the time, party and drink instead of travel and learn.

  • But guess what through all of these people was a reflection of myself.

  • E just wanted to say that when it comes to making friends in Japan, the best thing that you could do is join Facebook groups go to meet up and all of that kind of stuff.

  • And I feel like another great way toe meet people is on instagram, especially if you're a creative person.

  • A lot of people who live here, I've reached out to and said, Hey, let's go take some photos or take some videos or something like that.

  • So if you're a very creative person, I feel like that's a really good opportunity for you to meet People is on Instagram.

  • I met my husband on Instagram, so I feel like Instagram is a great place to meet really creative people and people that live here in general.

  • So I feel like because when you're isolated in Japan and you don't have your family, you're not in that family bubble.

  • You're not connected with your family all the time.

  • I feel like you kind of have to build that community.

  • And what better way to do that than meeting multiple different people that you usually don't hang out with?

  • And when you hang out with people that are different from you, you learn a lot about yourself and when you're not constantly feeling like you need to have family time all the time and you're constantly hanging out with new people on building your own family here you learn about yourself much faster, and I think it's a really good way to really start that self discovery journey and just that's what you kind of have to do.

  • You have to build your own family here.

  • I learned more about myself through the people who didn't align with my journey or my story, and with that, I didn't mind it.

  • When the people that were there before weren't here anymore.

  • It made space for those who fit what I wanted in my life.

  • It became effortless, so freaking cute.

  • I just can't.

  • My ovaries.

  • Oh my God.

  • Of the years that I've lived in Japan, I've never wore a yukata.

  • But I wore a kimono.

  • I wore a kimono to a wedding, and they're really heavy.

  • And going to the bathroom is impossible.

  • Take a look at the people you spend time with our they grounded in themselves.

  • Do they have themselves together?

  • If they don't, they just might not hold space for you at this time.

  • And that's okay.

  • Living here.

  • That awareness was amplified.

  • It's hard to see who's there for you and who's not when you're in a bubble of comfort.

  • If I were back home, I don't think I would recognize it as much as I do here.

  • The leaves are changing.

  • It's fall now.

  • The leaves air so beautiful here.

  • It's just such a beautiful day.

  • So nice and the sun is just hitting the trees right and everything like that.

  • So Tris, one with nature way honestly spend so much time stressing about who's there for us, who to hang out with fear of loneliness.

  • But the truth is, I learned that if I wasn't OK with being alone, I just keep pulling in the people that forced me to try hard to get them to stay.

  • Same for relationships here.

  • Once I let go and accepted that.

  • Hey, I might be that 70 year old cool aunt who lives alone with a zillion pet cats and sometimes goes on the occasional trip to Fiji.

  • I was able to live a life that made me feel supported without support.

  • If that makes sense, we're gonna end the night with karaoke because that's what happens when I go out with my friends way literally.

  • Always end the night with karaoke in every single video.

  • And I'm sure that people are gonna be tired of watching me go to karaoke.

  • But you know, you have Thio.

  • You just have to.

  • Wow, It got dark so fast.

  • Yeah, if you're heading for the coast, Too many people, actually, pretty.

  • For those of you back home right now, I know it's difficult to see friends now where social creatures and crave connection from time to time.

  • But how lucky are we to have the technology to connect with loved ones?

  • Imagine if we didn't have that on top of that.

  • Wow, what a chance to really work on ourselves and learn to make things work during hard times.

  • I grew Maura's a person this year than I did the year before.

  • Yes, times Air Skerry.

  • We pray for the world to get better, but this is one thing out of our control.

  • So do what you can control and come out of this.

  • A stronger person attracting new opportunities, a new crowd and an amplified life.

  • It's almost like she's singing e it e o it E o friend, let's take shots Way Very serious My husband came to pick me up Be so sweet.

  • Not only did I attract the best group of friends, I attracted the perfect husband just by learning what I wanted and didn't want in a person making the stakes, going through the heartaches and being myself Oh, my goodness.

  • This looks so good.

  • You're the best.

  • My voice is God.

  • Eventually you strip down your layers and the more you dio more life just close E circles in my head I've been running Wouldn't help.

  • Always starving for my purpose.

  • Maybe I ain't found it yet.

  • Honest questions with my mother.

before I moved to Japan.

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How to Make REAL Friends in Japan. (Story 8)

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    林宜悉 posted on 2020/11/29
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