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  • ♪ >> James: GOOD EVENING, LADIES

  • AND GENTLEMEN, AND WELCOME TO THE "LATE, LATE SHOW."

  • I MEAN I THINK THIS IS, I THINK THIS IS THE "LATE, LATE SHOW."

  • YOU MIGHT, HAVE TO BE PATIENT WITH ME, HONESTLY, MY BRAIN IS

  • STILL RECOVERING AFTER WATCHING LAST NIGHT'S PRESIDENTIAL

  • DEBATE.

  • I FEEL LIKE I'M STILL SHIVERING, YOU KNOW?

  • HONESTLY, THE WHOLE DAY TODAY IT FEELS LIKE MY LIFE IS BEING

  • PRODUCED BY JORD AFN PEELE.

  • I SHOWERED MORE TIMES LAST NIGHT THAN I HAVE IN THE PAST SIX

  • MONTHS.

  • >> I COULDN'T GET IT OFF ME.

  • BUT WE HAVE A GREAT SHOW PLANNED FOR YOU THIS EVENING.

  • BIG NEWS, FORMER SECRETARY OF STATE HILLARY CLINTON IS GOING

  • TO BE HERE TO TALK US THROUGH LAST NIGHT'S DEBATE.

  • THINK OF IT AS A GIANT THERAPY SESSION.

  • THAT'S THE THING.

  • STICK AROUND FOR THAT, REG, DID YOU WATCH THE DEBATE LAST NIGHT,

  • DID YOU SEE IT.

  • >> Reggie: OH MEI ME LORD, I WAS-- THAT WAS TOUGH, THAT WAS

  • REALLY TOUGH.

  • >> James: I WAS WATCHING IT WITH MY SON.

  • AND I WAS THINKING, MY SON IS NINE AND HIS YOUNGE-- YOUNGER

  • SISTER HAS JUST GONE TO BED AND I WAS THINKING THIS IS NOT GREAT

  • BECAUSE THERE IS THE EXACT BEHAVIOR WE TELL YOU NOT TO DO.

  • IF YOU MISSED THE DEBATE, HERE SAN ELOQUENT SUM ACHES BY SOME

  • OF AMERICA'S TOP JOURNALISTS.

  • >> THIS WAS SUCH A HOT MESS.

  • >> THAT WAS THE WORST PRESIDENTIAL DEBATE HAVE I EVER

  • SEEN.

  • >> A NIGHT OF CHAOS, AND INTERRUPTION, WHERE.

  • >> BULLYING.

  • >> THIS WAS EMBARRASSING FOR ME.

  • >> CLEARLY THIS DEBATE WAS AN EMBARRASSMENT FOR THE UNITED

  • STATES OF AMERICA.

  • >> THAT WAS A HOT MESS, INSIDE A DUMPSTER FIRE INSIDE A

  • TRAINWRECK.

  • >> THAT WAS [BLEEP] SHOW.

  • >> TERRIFYING NIGHTMARE ONLY THIS IS THE REAL THING.

  • >> IT IS JUST SHOCKING CONSIDERING EVERYTHING ELSE THIS

  • YEAR HAS GONE SO WELL.

  • THAT'S RIGHT, IT'S BEING CALLED THE WORST PRESIDENTIAL DEBATE OF

  • ALL TIME BUT REMEMBER THERE'S STILL TWO POR DEBATES TO GO.

  • SO WHO KNOWS.

  • IF IT GETS THE CHANCE TO HANG ON TO THAT RECORD.

  • I DON'T EVEN THINK WORD DEBATE IS ENOUGH, I THINK THEY HAVE TOK

  • PANNED IT.

  • I THINK IT MAY BE THE WORST THING EVER THAT OURED ON

  • TELEVISION.

  • AND ON THIS SHOW WE ONCE PLAYED A GAME CALLED ARE YOU MART

  • SMARTER THAN A WHOOPI GOLDBERG IMPERSONATOR.

  • (LAUGHTER) DO YOU REMEMBER THAT?

  • >> OH YEAH, I REMEMBER THAT.

  • I THINK ABOUT IT BEFORE I FALL ASLEEP EVERY NIGHT.

  • >> I THINK ABOUT IT AND I SOMETIMES THINK I THINK ABOUT

  • THE LEVEL OF THINGS THAT HAD TO HAPPEN FOR THAT TO END UP ON

  • TELEVISION.

  • LIKE WE ALL PITCH BAD THINGS FROM TIME TO TIME.

  • BUT WE HAD A WHOOPI GOLDBERG IMPERSONATOR HERE AND I THINK

  • CHRISTIAN SLATER HAD TO ANSWER QUESTIONS, DO YOU REMEMBER THAT,

  • GUILLERMO, CHRISTIAN SLATER HAD TO ANSWER QUESTIONS AS TO

  • WHETHER HE WAS SMARTER THAN A WHOOPI GOLDBERG IMPERSONATOR.

  • >> I PUT THIS OUT OF MY MIND FOR SURE.

  • >> YEAH, I WILL BE HONEST, YOU WON'T FIND IT ON YOUTUBE.

  • AND MOST VIEWERS AGREED THAT THE DEBAE LAST NIGHT WAS NOT

  • PLEASANT BECAUSE ACCORDING TO A CBS NEWS POLL EIGHT OUT OF TEN

  • AMERICANS THOUGHT THE TONE OF DEBATE WAS NEGATIVE.

  • THE OTHER TWO WILL SAY ANYTHING TO GET THEIR DAD'S APPROVAL.

  • NEVER GOING TO HAPPEN, ERIC.

  • INCREDIBLY, 17% OF PEOPLE POLLED ACTUALLY THOUGHT THE DEBATE WAS

  • POSITIVE.

  • THOSE 17 PERCENT ARE ALSO THE PEOPLE WHO STILL THINK GENDER

  • REVEAL PARTIES ARE FUN.

  • TRUMP WAS SO AGGRESSIVE AND RUDE THAT AT ONE POINT BIDEN COULDN'T

  • HELP BUT BE PRETTY RUDE HIMSELF.

  • >> WOULD YOU.

  • >> WAIT A MINUTE THE FINAL WORD.

  • >> WELL IT'S HARD TO GET ANY WORD WITH THIS CLOWN, EXCUSE ME,

  • THIS PERSON.

  • >> LET ME TELL YOU-- .

  • >> James: NOW I DON'T THINK THIS IS FAIR, OKAY, I WANT TO

  • STICK UP FOR CLOWNS HERE.

  • BECAUSE, I DO.

  • CLOWNS THEY GET-- SOME-- CLOWNS ONLY MAKE SOME PEOPLE CRY, YOU

  • KNOW.

  • >> Reggie: TRUE.

  • >> James: AND THAT WASN'T THE ONLY TIME BIDEN GOT FRUSTRATED

  • BY TRUMP'S CONSTANT INTERRUPTIONS.

  • AT ANOTHER POINT HE SAID THIS.

  • >> YOU ARE IN VOTE NOW, VOTE AND LET YOUR SENATORS KNOW HOW

  • STRONG YOU FEEL.

  • >> ARE YOU GOING TO.

  • >> VOTE NOWRKS MAKE SURE YOU LET PEOPLE KNOW, YOUR SENATORS.

  • >> I'M NOT GOING TO ANSWER THE QUESTION.

  • >> WHY WON'T YOU ANSWER THE QUESTION.

  • >> THE QUESTION IS SHALL DID SHALL.

  • >> THE QUESTION.

  • >> RADICAL LEVEL.

  • >> WILL YOU SHUT UP, MAN.

  • >> Reggie: YES, YES.

  • (APPLAUSE).

  • >> James: AND IT WORKED, IT WORKED, TRUMP WAS INCREDIBLY

  • QUIET AND RESPECT FOR-- RESPECTFUL FOR THE REST OF

  • THE DEBATE.

  • I WOULDN'T BE SUR PRIESED IF HE IS STILL AT THE PODIUM NOW,

  • DOESN'T KNOW EVERYONE HAS LEFT AND HE IS STILL JUST TALKING.

  • THE FORMER VICE PRESIDENT JUST TALKED TO TRUMP.

  • HE TALKED THE TRUMP THE SAME WAY YOU TALK TO YOUR BROTHER, LIKE

  • WHEN HE WON'T STOP ASKING QUESTIONS WHILE YOU ARE TRYING

  • TO WATCH THE GREAT BRITISH BAKING SHOW, YOU KNOW WHAT I

  • MEAN, THIS ISN'T THE TECHNICAL CHALLENGE, IT IS THE SHOW

  • STOPPER, I EXPLAINED IT TO YOU.

  • I EXPLAINED IT TO YOU BEFORE.

  • THERE IS THE-- WILL YOU JUST SHUT UP, MANK I'M TRAYING TO

  • LOOK AT A ZIGGY STARDUST CAKE.

  • BUT A LOT OF PEOPLE ONLINE PRAISED BIDEN FOR SAYING, ONE

  • PERSON WILL EVEN SWEET TWEETED WILL YOU SHUT UP, MAN, IS THE

  • LINE OF THE NIGHT.

  • AND THEN I SO FEEL FOR MILLIARY RIGHT NOW BECAUSE I'M POSITIVE

  • SHE WANTED TO SAY THAT AND SHE COULDN'T.

  • TO WHICH HILLARY CLINTON ACTUALLY RESPONDED, YOU HAVE NO

  • IDEA.

  • I THINK I'VE GOT AN IDEA.

  • >> Reggie: YEAH.

  • >> James: AND WE'LL FIND OUT A LITTLE LATER TONIGHT WHEN WE SIT

  • DOWN WITH SECRETARY CLINTON AND HAVE A CHAT.

  • ONE OF THE MOST OUTRAGE MOST-- OUTRAGEOUS MOMENTS WAS

  • WHEN TRUMP FAILED TO CONDEMN WHITE SUPREMACY AND FOX NEWS

  • CRITICIZED TRUMP FOR NOT TAKING A STAND.

  • >> DONALD TRUMP PROVED THE BIGGEST WAY UP IN THE HISTORY OF

  • DEBATES BY SAYING NOT CONDEMNING WHITE SPREMMIST.

  • I DONE KNOW IF HE DIDN'T HEAR IT BUT HE HAS TO CLARIFY THAT RIGHT

  • AWAY, THAT IS LUKE ARE YOU AGAINST EVIL.

  • WHY THE PRESIDENT DIDN'T JUST KNOCK IT OUT OF THE PARK I'M NOT

  • SURE.

  • >> James: I'M PRETTY SURE.

  • YOU KNOW, AT LEAST IT'S A HUNCH.

  • YOU KNOW THINGS ARE BAD WHEN FOX NEWS IS TELLING YOU COME ON,

  • SIR, JUST SAY ARE YOU NOT RACIST.

  • TRUMP WOULDN'T CONDEMN WHITE SUPREMACY GROUPS EVEN WHEN THEY

  • PRESSED HIM.

  • I MEAN FOR A GUY ON HIS THIRD MARRIAGE I DIDN'T EXPECT HIM TO

  • BE THIS LOYAL PEOPLE WERE SO DISTURBED BY WHAT HAPPENED

  • DURING LAST NIGHT'S DISASTER A SPECIFIC GOOGLE SEARCH SPIKED

  • SIGNIFICANTLY IN AMERICA RIGHT AFTER THE DEBATE.

  • AND THAT SEARCH WAS MOVE TO CANADA.

  • AND MOST OF THAT SEARCHING WAS DONE BY CHRIS WALLACE.

  • THE SEARCHES WITH MOST POPULAR IN MASSACHUSETTS, OHIO AND

  • MICHIGAN WHICH IS SOME BICK BATTLEGROUND STATES.

  • MEANWHILE THE GOOGLE SEARCH MOST POPULAR IN FLORIDA WAS STILL CAN

  • MY ALLIGATOR GET A JET SKI LICENSE.

  • FOR THE MOST PART LAST NIGHT'S DEBATE WAS A COMPLETE WASTE OF

  • TIME.

  • BUT ONE THING WE DID LEARN FOR SURE IS THAT JOE BIEDERN, JOE

  • BIDEN KNOWS WHERE THE DEAL IS.

  • >> NOW HERE'S THE DEAL.

  • >> HERE'S THE DEAL.

  • >> HERE'S THE DEAL.

  • >> HERE'S THE DEAL.

  • >> HERE'S THE DEAL.

  • >> HERE'S THE DEAL.

  • >> HERE'S THE DEAL.

  • >> HERE'S THE DEAL.

  • >> YOU THE WORST PRESIDENT AMERICA HAS EVER HAD SWRZ AND

  • THAT IS THE DEAL.

♪ >> James: GOOD EVENING, LADIES

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We Hope You Survived the Trump-Biden Debate

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    林宜悉   posted on 2020/10/28
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