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  • Are you close to your dad?

  • You guys close?

  • Yeah.

  • I mean, look, I feel like you can love a parent and not always see eye to eye, you know?

  • And I don't necessarily agree on women's autonomy, for example.

  • So I like to donate to Planned Parenthood in his name.

  • Yeah, I performed.

  • I perform for them a couple times as well.

  • Isn't it weird?

  • For some reason, comics always get booked to perform a charity events.

  • Yeah, I've done it.

  • I have to say I've done charity events before and it's almost a Ziff.

  • The people booking it don't understand what comedy is because I always want to say to them afterwards, Comedy needs some kind of context, you know you need the room has to be prepared for comedy.

  • And sometimes if it's a really dark charity, they don't prepare the room in any way.

  • Have you had that happen?

  • Oh, my gosh.

  • Yeah.

  • One year plant there.

  • I had asked me to come perform at their fundraiser, called the Birds and Bees bash.

  • It was in Santa Barbara, California.

  • It was a bunch of rich old people gathered together.

  • The throw money at the cost.

  • Beautiful thing.

  • So it's like this swanky event and I slapped on a skirt, which is obviously a big deal for me.

  • And so what's in this beautiful banquet hall?

  • And they sent me down in the back next to Joanna Kerns.

  • You know who that is?

  • Right?

  • Uh, she's a sitcom actress.

  • What is she?

  • What was she on?

  • She was Mrs Seaver from growing pains.

  • Oh, okay.

  • Yeah.

  • Growing pains.

  • I'm a little old for growing pains.

  • Uh, okay, I do remember that show.

  • I know who she is.

  • Yes.

  • Yeah.

  • I was so excited.

  • And I sat down and she explained that she is going to give the keynote speech and then she'll bring me up to do 15 minutes of stand up.

  • So Joanna is up there talking about Planned Parenthood.

  • What it means to her and her family and a woman in the back of the banquet hall next to me at our table starts toe have ah, heart attack.

  • Yeah.

  • So Joanna is just She just keeps talking because she doesn't know what's going on in the back of the room.

  • Just like I can't always know what's going on in the back of every room I'm performing in.

  • People could be in the kitchen right now making sweet, sweet love And I would have no clue Especially if it was, like, super slow like I like won't be able to hear him.

  • So join us up here talking.

  • This woman is having a heart attack.

  • I'm watching your have a heart attack.

  • But I'm also thinking, like what?

  • Joke?

  • Something in itself, right?

  • And then And ambulance comes very quickly, almost as if they knew there was, like a gathering of old.

  • And they just, like, parked on the corner.

  • So they Russian whenever it's an ambulance that drives around it.

  • If it seems like eight or more old people gather in one spot, it waits there for 10 minutes because they know they know something's going to go down.

  • Got her a garage sale.

  • Oh, how did that just happen?

  • Did you hear that?

  • No.

  • Oh, someone just tried to call and I went to my computer anyway, So the ambulance comes very quickly.

  • They Russian?

  • They put this woman on a stretcher because it was a heart attack.

  • But it was like a low key heart attack.

  • She fell out of her chair and her husband was worried.

  • But as they're wheeling her out past our table towards the door, she looks at us and she says, I'm so sorry.

  • I'm fine.

  • I'm so sorry.

  • Which, like, might be the epitome of being a woman.

  • She's like, I'm sorry I interrupted with a heart attack.

  • I'm happy to die.

  • If that helps, I really will.

  • I'll go die.

  • So this is when they have her outside the door.

  • And just then Joanna Kerns leans into the microphone and she says, Who's ready for some stand up comedy?

  • And I'm in the back of the room like So I get up.

  • I'm weaving my way through the tables and my dumb skirt.

  • The woman whose planned the event intercepts me.

  • She puts her hand on my shoulder.

  • She's panicked and she's like, I don't know, maybe you should do less time like five minutes or something.

  • I was like, Lady, I'm doing 15 you know.

  • So I get up there in front of everyone felt like I really needed to address the situation you had.

  • Someone just had a heart attack, right?

  • Right, right.

  • So I get up in front of everybody and I just say, Wow, I've done a lot of things to get out of donating money, but never that not everybody laughed.

  • You know, it took It was it was potentially while it was potentially too soon.

  • My dad, however very proud I bombed the Planned Parenthood.

  • And if he had been, there would have been so happy.

  • You know, I think I I don't know if I could top that, but I have something that was equally rough where I did a benefit.

  • And it was, you know, for people in the military.

  • And so the whole audience was packed with, you know, people who had served in the military very recently and and come back from Afghanistan or Iraq.

  • And it was it was intense.

  • They showed this really intense film.

  • Then an honor guard came out and they said, Now we remember our fallen brothers and they played taps on a bugle.

  • And then right after they finished playing taps of a voice on the microphone said, Ladies and gentlemen, Conan O'Brien e just walked out there.

  • People are crying.

  • Their heads were bowed way.

  • Need time between that?

  • Yes and Mr Goofy You need something a something a little light, something a little.

  • Someone comes out with a harmonica and plays Monica.

  • You know, I'm gonna pitch jock jams.

  • You know, just confuse the room with some high energy jock jams.

  • You really think that's a punch up the jam?

  • Pump it up.

  • Yeah, just blow out the room with some hot Tim's.

  • No, you can't follow tax with Jock Jam.

Are you close to your dad?

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A2 heart attack attack joanna jock parenthood room

Beth Stelling Had To Perform Following An Audience Member Heart Attack - CONAN on TBS

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    林宜悉 posted on 2020/10/24
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