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  • Lately, you've been finding the allure of affordable Swedish flat-pack furniture just

  • too strong to resist.

  • So, you mosey on down to the local Ikea superstore.

  • You'll get yourself some nice, new furniture, and stop by the restaurant for some meatballs

  • at lunch.

  • What could possibly go wrong?

  • Except, on your way to find the perfect Kleppstad wardrobe, you find you've lost your way.

  • And I mean really lost your way, you have no idea where you are.

  • You might have chalked it up to the confusing store layout or your own terrible sense of

  • direction, if it weren't for the seven-foot-tall, faceless monsters in Ikea uniforms wandering

  • around.

  • That's because you're not just trapped in any Ikea, you're trapped in SCP – 3008,

  • the infinite Ikea!

  • What started as a battle to not spend too much money on shelving units has become a

  • battle for your life and freedom, but don't worry.

  • With our help, we can make sure your final resting place isn't an Ikea Tomrefjord bed.

  • First, some important ground rules: This is gonna be a little different to some of our

  • other You Vs videos because, simply put, you can't defeat or kill SCP – 3008, only

  • escape or survive it.

  • Unlike a number of battles against the frightening creatures and entities of the SCP Foundation,

  • you won't have foundation knowledge, personnel, resources, or weapons to help you.

  • So, no heavily armed SWAT teams or backup Predator Drones.

  • But don't let that dishearten you.

  • After all, you'll be in the largest Ikea known to man, so you won't have to look

  • far to find the comforts of home or potential improvised weapons.

  • But let's not get too ahead of ourselves.

  • After all, it doesn't matter how many weapons you have.

  • If you don't understand your enemy first, an AK-47 might as well be a BB gun.

  • SCP – 3008 is technically the umbrella term for two different kinds of dangerous anomaly,

  • both of which you'll be facing up against today: SCP – 3008 – 1 and SCP – 3008

  • – 2.

  • SCP – 3008 – 1 is the specific term for the anomalous section of the store you're

  • currently trapped in.

  • The gateway to this particular area is always situated in a seemingly normal Ikea superstore,

  • and its size is estimated to be anywhere between 10 square kilometres and infinity itself.

  • Thankfully, escape from this area isn't unprecedented, as The SCP Foundation has recorded

  • at least fourteen successful escapes since they first brought the area into containment.

  • We won't crush your spirits by telling you how small a portion of the overall amount

  • trapped inside that is, but it's comforting to know you at least have an above 0% chance

  • of getting out of this situation alive.

  • But the things that'll make that a lot harder are SCP – 3008 – 02, dangerous humanoid

  • entities known to the prisoners of SCP – 3008 – 01 asThe Staff.”

  • And while the thought of Ikea staff probably brings to mind smiling, helpful people in

  • yellow shirts and blue pants, that thought couldn't be more wrong here.

  • Well, apart from the yellow shirts and blue pants.

  • These things still have those.

  • The first thing you're likely to notice about The Staff inside of SCP – 3008 is

  • their freakish proportions.

  • They're described as either being too tall or too short, so you'll have to be on the

  • lookout above and below.

  • The Staff also tend to have long, powerful limbs with large hands that allow them to

  • grab prey, such as yourself, at an impressive distance.

  • They also seem to lack any kind of facial features, bones, blood, or internal organs.

  • It seems less obvious than some of the other advantages possessed by The Staff, like their

  • strength or numerical superiority, but the first thing they have on you is psychological.

  • As a normal and at least somewhat sane human being, seeing monsters without faces running

  • around is likely going to be a shock to you.

  • Even more than that, considering you're lost and disoriented, nobody could blame you

  • for being afraid of The Staff, either.

  • The problem here is that fear tends to either lead to panic or hesitation.

  • And if one or even a few of these things are bearing down on you and you freeze up, even

  • for a second, chances are that you're probably a goner.

  • That's why steeling your nerves, keeping your wits about you, and cultivating a strong

  • survival instinct is key to your survival while trapped in SCP – 3008.

  • And now, some good news, before you get it into your head that you won't be leaving

  • this Ikea alive any time soon.

  • While The Staff can be frightening and even deadly in the right circumstances, they're

  • not in constant attack mode.

  • Even though SCP – 3008 – 1 is entirely indoors, the automatic lighting up above simulates

  • periods of day and night.

  • While The Staff are incredibly hostile during the night time periods, they're shown to

  • be docile and unresponsive during the day.

  • We still wouldn't recommend attempting a sneak attack on them during the day, as they've

  • been known to react violently to attack at all times, but you can at least use the daytime

  • periods to prepare yourself for later combat.

  • Not only can you use this time to get used to seeing them, and thus reduce your fear

  • of them during night time skirmishes, you can also collect weapons, intel, and supplies

  • while the creatures are docile.

  • Then, when night falls, you're ready to fight.

  • You'll probably be happy to hear that, while the creatures do wield impressive physical

  • strength and seemingly unlimited numbers, they only have the endurance of your average

  • human.

  • In other words, anything that can kill you can also kill them, giving you a slightly

  • more even playing field.

  • This brings us to the fun part: Weapons.

  • Luckily for you, seeing as you're in a potentially limitless version of one of the largest home

  • retailers in the world, you have plenty of options for arming yourself.

  • While grabbing enough large, heavy objects to turn yourself into a Swedish, flat-pack

  • Conan The Barbarian may seem like a good idea, we personally recommend keeping it a little

  • simpler.

  • Having a light loadout allows for speedy movement and manoeuvrability, so what could be better

  • than the blades of an Ikea 365+ three-piece kitchen knife set and a sturdy claw hammer

  • from the 17-piece Fixa tool kit?

  • While trying to avoid The Staff at night is probably your best option, if one of them

  • does somehow end up getting all up-close and personal, it likely won't survive getting

  • a kitchen knife rammed through its faceless skull.

  • Thankfully, you at least have the element of stealth on your side, as Staff constantly

  • repeat the phraseThe store is now closed, please exit the building" while in attack

  • mode.

  • Even if you don't have a chance to run and hide, that'll at least give you a window

  • to warm up your hammering arm.

  • Of course, while being able to go toe-to-toe with The Staff is definitely an essential

  • skill if you want to survive your SCP – 3008 experience, you can't afford to stop there.

  • After all, people can spend entire years trapped in the store, and while you hope to be out

  • of here a lot sooner than that, it'll probably dawn on you long before then that you can't

  • survive by eating knives and hammers.

  • Thankfully, SCP – 3008 actually has you covered here, as there appears to be multiple

  • Ikea restaurants and food service areas where supplies are periodically restocked.

  • This is where you'll need to restock if you don't want to starve before you even

  • get a chance to escape.

  • But you might think, “Can I really rely on this?

  • After all, with a place as easy to get lost in as SCP – 3008, might it be whole days

  • between finding adequate food supplies?”

  • And good, that's the kind of practical thinking that'll get you out of here alive.

  • Thankfully, you can take some extra food with you each time with the help of an Ikea Kylväska

  • cooling bag and some Ikea Kylklamp cold packs.

  • This will give you some rations to keep with you during your travels and escape attempts,

  • and will also give you some valuables to exchange and trade.

  • That's right, because as luck would have it, you're far from the only one stuck in

  • this weird, Swedish mess.

  • There are actually so many people trapped in SCP – 3008 that they've essentially

  • been able to construct an entire new civilisation inside the store.

  • Whole townships and settlements have been built and fortified entirely with Ikea furniture,

  • full of thriving little populations doing what they can to get by in this strange new

  • world.

  • If you're thinking, “I don't have time to make friends, I want to get out of here

  • as soon as possible”, you might as well hand yourself over to The Staff now and get

  • your mauling over with.

  • As the old truism goes, “There's safety in numbers.”

  • And even the luckiest people to escape SCP – 3008 have, at the very least, spent a

  • few weeks inside.

  • In that time, unless you want to go insane or die from exhaustion, you're gonna need

  • to sleep.

  • If you try the lone wolf method and sleep on one of the display beds out in the open,

  • you're extremely vulnerable to attacks from The Staff while you sleep.

  • But if you manage to get yourself to one of the human settlements inside SCP – 3008

  • and start making some friends, you'll have the benefit of cover while you rest and sleep

  • so long as you're willing to help return the favour from time to time.

  • People holed up in these fortified settlements have observed that, at least a few nights

  • each week, The Staff are likely to swarm and attack said settlements in large numbers.

  • When that happens, if you want to survive, you're gonna need to help your human allies

  • hold the line against the oncoming horde of faceless monsters by any means necessary.

  • And after each battle, you'll need to help your new friends haul the Staff corpses to

  • elsewhere in the store.

  • Detecting even part of one of their own in your settlement's proximity can cause them

  • to frenzy and launch even more brutal attacks, whichas someone who wants to survive

  • this whole thingyou really do not want.

  • With all these other issuesfrom food to social interaction and rest to successfully

  • fighting off The Staffsquared away, it's time to move on to the main event: Actually

  • escaping this place.

  • As we stated before, while it isn't easy, it can be doneyou just need to be both

  • persistent and tactical about it.

  • First of all, it's best to communicate with some of your fellow humans trapped in SCP

  • – 3008, to see if any of them can recall any memorable details about when they first

  • entered the anomalous zone.

  • Another key marker in attempting to escape this place is SCP Foundation drones.

  • The Foundation has been using remote-controlled recon drones to explore the interior of SCP

  • – 3008, and tracking the movements and directions of these drones may make it a little easier

  • to find a way out of here.

  • Finally, it's time to put boots on the ground and actually find your way to one of the exits.

  • It would be productive to team up with some trusted humans and form an expedition party,

  • allowing you to collectively carry more supplies and defend one another if night falls and

  • you're left vulnerable to attacks from The Staff.

  • But in a place that could potentially be infinite, and in a store with as confusing a layout

  • as Ikea, how can you be sure you're not just walking around in circles?

  • Simple.

  • All you need to do is get your hands on plenty of Ikea Behandla black glazing paint and some

  • Ikea Fixa paint brushes.

  • If you paint a black line down each aisle you explore, you suddenly have a route that

  • you can both double back on to a settlement if necessary, and ensure you won't be going

  • in circles.

  • Almost like the classic Hansel and Gretel bread crumb trail.

  • You can perform more expeditions every day, pushing out a little further each time, covering

  • and marking out more ground.

  • If you follow the rest of the instructions here, you'll stay well-fed, well-rested,

  • survive The Staff, and maybe even make some friends, but most importantly, you'll have

  • a much higher chance of finally escaping this flat-pack nightmare.

  • There have been reports that the exit will occasionally disappear and reappear, but don't

  • let that worry you.

  • If you remain persistent and don't let yourself get disheartened, you'll find that exit

  • someday.

  • When that eventually does happen, you and your party will likely be greeted, detained,

  • and debriefed by some SCP Foundation Field Operatives.

  • Once you've delivered all relevant information over to them, you'll be given SCP Foundation

  • Amnestics and be made to forget the whole thing ever even happened.

  • The Foundation will transport you back to your under-furnished room safe and sound,

  • with nothing but a lingering thought that it might just be better to do all your furniture

  • shopping online in future

  • Check out ourYou Vsplaylist for more exciting videos on how to defeat some of pop

  • culture's biggest badasses, monsters, heroes, and psychopaths.

Lately, you've been finding the allure of affordable Swedish flat-pack furniture just

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B1 scp ikea staff trapped survive escape

YOU vs SCP-3008 - Trapped In Infinite Ikea

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    Summer posted on 2020/09/20
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