Subtitles section Play video
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- Welcome fruit lovers!
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I'm Pear, and-
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- Cut, cut.
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Let's try that again, this time with more emotion.
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- More emotion?
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Dude, I'm just introducing the video.
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- Oh, wait, I misread that.
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Not more emotion, more explosions.
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(laughing)
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Back to one.
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- Ugh.
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Anyway, I'm Pear, and this is Orange on a power trip.
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- We're showing you how to direct a movie.
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Watch and learn, people!
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- As you can see, somebody thought it'd be a good idea
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to give Orange a bullhorn and let him direct this episode.
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- Release the doves, release the crew for lunch,
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release your bowels.
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(laughing)
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Okay, back to one.
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- Ugh, anyway, here goes nothing.
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Step one, go through the script with a director's eye.
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- This is total garbage!
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Needs a complete rewrite.
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- Um, dude, that is garbage.
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The script is over here.
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- Oh.
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Hey, I just had a brilliant idea for the new ending.
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Single tear will roll down our lead actor's cheek.
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- Wow, well that's an improvement over
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the usual TNT explosion ending.
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- Yeah, Pear, this is serious art we're doing here.
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Back to one!
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- Do you even know what "back to one" means?
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You sure are saying it a lot.
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- You think this is easy, Pear?
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I'm wearing a turtleneck, and I don't even have a neck.
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(laughing)
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- Uh, the next step a director should take
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is to plan out your shots.
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- Okay, so we'll have a crane shot,
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followed by a crane shot, followed by a crane shot,
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followed by-
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- Lemme guess, another crane shot.
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- (scoffs) please.
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Shot number four is a slime shot.
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- What the heck is a- (screaming)
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- Perfect!
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Moving onto shot number five, another crane shot!
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(laughing)
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- Ugh, okay.
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Step three is to get the most out of your actors.
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- (Orange) Um, Pear, I'm sorry to inform you,
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but you've been recast.
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We're bringing in someone else to play the role of Pear.
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- What?
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Who could play Pear better than me?
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- Daniel Day-Lewis.
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- Okay, that's fair.
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- Okay, that's fair.
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- Are you just copying what I say?
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- Indeed, it's how I learn your ways.
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- Ugh.
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- Ugh.
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- Stop it.
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- Stop it.
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- Orange.
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- Orange.
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- Ah.
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- Orange, I'm worried this character might be too boring.
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Mind if I spice him up a little bit?
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I'm thinking something along the lines of,
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"Hello, fruit lovers!
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I'm Pear, and welcome to how to."
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- Wow, that was perfect.
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Brilliant! (audience cheering)
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That's a wrap, cut.
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Back to one.
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Let's get loud.
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- Uh, not so fast, Orange.
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There's still step four.
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Once filming is complete, the director still needs
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to oversee the editing process.
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- Ah, do I have to?
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I really just liked yelling at people with a bullhorn.
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- Orange, you have to keep an eye on the editors.
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They're a weird bunch.
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If you don't watch them like a hawk, who knows
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what kinda crazy things they might slip in?
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- Like what?
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- [Pear] Well, you're blue now, for one thing,
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but seems like that might be the least of your worries.
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- Ah, oh no, I lost control.
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I've failed as a director.
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Pear, how do I get things back on track?
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- Just make sure the video ends the way you planned.
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The single tear, remember?
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- That's right, the single tear.
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Editor, fix my mistakes, we've (indistinct)
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Make him sadder, sadder I say!
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Ah, can't you fix this?
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I'm telling you, we need more emotion.
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Oh wait, I misread that, I need more explosion.
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- Hey, I could do that.
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No sweat, boss.
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(explosion) (laughing) - Nooo!
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(upbeat music)