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  • Hi.

  • I'm Ronnie.

  • Do you go to the gym?

  • Did you know that at the gym there are different animals that are there?

  • You think we're all humans, but I don't know what happens - as soon as you go to the gym,

  • all of a sudden these different animals come out and start doing crazy animal things.

  • This lesson is especially for Carol; thanks for all your help.

  • Love you, girl.

  • This is for you.

  • What kind of animal are you at the gym?

  • The most popular animal that you can see at the gym or what kinda animal...

  • Now, "kinda" is how we say "kind of".

  • We never say: "kind of"; we say: "kinda".

  • So, what kind of animal are you?

  • The most popular is the rat.

  • You will hear this expression a lot.

  • People will say: "He's a gym rat." or "She's a gym rat."

  • This just means that they are always at the gym.

  • So, when you go there, you always see these people.

  • I'm not too sure why it's a rat, because rats are kind of dirty, they're not very strong,

  • they have long tails, and they live in a sewer - which is very different from a gym, but

  • I didn't make these up.

  • Yes, I did, but I didn't make up the rat part.

  • So, are you a gym rat?

  • Or are you more of a gorilla?

  • So, gentlemen, it seems that when you go to the gym you all of a sudden like to make noises,

  • like this: "Ah!

  • Ah!

  • Ahh!

  • Ugh!"

  • This is called "grunting".

  • "Ugh!"

  • Sometimes I wonder what guys are doing in the other part of the gym.

  • So, a gorilla is a big, hairy animal-[grunts]-that make a lot of noises, like this.

  • So, in English, we have a word called "grunt", and grunt is like: "Hu, hu".

  • We also have a word called "moan".

  • Now, "moan" can be quite sexual.

  • This gets Ronnie wondering what exactly the men are doing.

  • Moaning is like: "Unh.

  • Unh."

  • Are you lifting weights, sir, or are you lifting something else?

  • Mm-hmm.

  • So, there is a big hairy gorilla that grunts and moans.

  • Ugh.

  • Next up we have the proud peacock.

  • The peacock is a kind of guy or girl who loves to walk around the gym, and show off their

  • body.

  • So maybe they're guys kissing their muscles, or girls that are combing their hair.

  • So, we have an expression called "strut".

  • "To strut" means you walk like you're very sexy.

  • Not like a gorilla, but you're walking and you're hoping that everyone in the gym is

  • looking at you.

  • So, "strutting" is to walk very sexily in the gym.

  • It's so sweaty and disgusting there.

  • What are you doing?

  • Just do your workout.

  • Walk down the street.

  • Strut down the street - that's better.

  • Peacocks also like to show off their feathers.

  • So maybe they have beautiful muscles, like I said, or maybe they have a beautiful bottom,

  • which means bum.

  • They like to show it off and wave it in your face when you're doing...

  • When you're working out.

  • I don't want your bum in my face, thank you.

  • As much as I think it's nice, I really don't want your arse in my face.

  • Also, the male peacock tries to intimidate other males, so they...

  • It's not only a male/female thing, but men might go around and try to flex their muscles

  • more than the other guys, especially if a girl walks by; or they will count extra reps.

  • "Reps" means repetitions.

  • So, instead of doing: "One, two", they're like: "200.

  • Ugh.

  • Ah.

  • 299."

  • You just did 100 within one count.

  • These peacocks, watch out for them.

  • They do have beautiful tails, though; one can't help but look.

  • The next one, one of my favourites, is the monkey.

  • The wee monkey.

  • What are you doing, wee monkey?

  • The monkey is my favourite.

  • If you've ever gone to a gym and used the equipment, which is like weights or machines,

  • there's a proper way to do it.

  • Okay?

  • There's a little picture.

  • So, it's like: "Sit down, put your leg here and your arm here, and do this."

  • So, the person decides to get in upside down and their legs are where their arms should

  • be, and they're just doing...

  • And: What are you doing?

  • So these are monkeys.

  • Monkeys are silly; they're playing around, and they're basically doing the exercises-the

  • machines-the wrong way.

  • Getting results?

  • I don't know.

  • Maybe they get an extra banana in their protein shake after they've done this.

  • But monkeys are just there to play around.

  • They're fun.

  • Aw, aren't they cute?

  • Get off of the machine, you monkey.

  • Next one: Squirrel.

  • You know what a squirrel is?

  • Do you have squirrels in your country?

  • We have lots of squirrels in Canada, and squirrels basically, what they do by nature is they

  • go around and they collect all the nuts, and then they hide them so nobody else gets their

  • nuts.

  • So at a gym there's the one person, male or female, that's going to go around and get

  • all of the equipment.

  • So they're going to get all of the weights...

  • So weights are like heavy machines, heavy things like this; or dumbbells or barbells.

  • Now, barbells look like this, but they're bigger.

  • So what they do is they hoard all the equipment.

  • So, they get all of the weights-there's no way they can use 12 weights-and "hoard them"

  • means to gather and keep so no one else can use them.

  • So, instead of nuts, they're taking all the equipment, and they spread it all around and

  • there isn't enough equipment for other people.

  • So, these damn squirrels, you took my nuts.

  • You took my weights.

  • This is my favourite.

  • I made these up, by the way.

  • A dog.

  • What does a dog do?

  • A dog likes to mark its territory.

  • How does a dog mark its territory?

  • "Piss".

  • It pees on something.

  • Now, I'm not suggesting that people pee in the gym on the machines, though sometimes

  • it does smell that; but a dog basically calls dibs on the machines.

  • So, "calling dibs" on something means to say: "This is mine."

  • So, we don't actually pee on them; we just say: "This is my machine."

  • So, what would happen is if you're doing a set or if you're doing a round in the gym,

  • maybe one person is doing what's called a-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-"superset".

  • A "superset" is basically: I will use two machines at the same...

  • Not at the same time - that's crazy.

  • I will use two machines, do both the machines, and then take a break.

  • Traditionally, we do one machine, take a break, and do the next machine; but a superset involves

  • using two machines sponta-...

  • Together.

  • Okay?

  • Not spontaneously.

  • So, you can do this, yes; but if the gym is busy, there's a problem.

  • So you're not going to go and go: "Piss - this is my machine; piss - this is my machine,

  • too."

  • You have to be aware that people are around you, so don't be a dog.

  • Don't be a dog, man.

  • Lions.

  • Do you guys know what lions are famous for?

  • Lions are very proud, kind of like a peacock, but they always have the nicest flash new

  • workout gear.

  • "Flash" means beautifully stylish; usually very expensive; and "workout gear" basically

  • means the clothes that you wear to the gym.

  • So, these lions will have the most beautiful, expensive workout gear.

  • And do you know what they do?

  • They don't really work out.

  • They spend most of the time looking in the mirror or taking selfies.

  • Oh, hey.

  • Watching themselves as they workout.

  • Those lions, watch out for them - they might bite you.

  • Do you have a bird in the gym?

  • I think I might do this.

  • I might be a bird.

  • I always wear headphones or earphones, and quite often when I walk down the street I

  • will sing because I'm just so damn happy all the time.

  • But at the gym, there are people who sing when other people are around them.

  • Unfortunately these people are not professional singers and they're usually not very good

  • at, so these are what I'm going to call the birds.

  • They sing and you just want them to shut up.

  • These birds also have a tendency to use their phones, instead of working out; they sit on

  • the machines and text.

  • Maybe they're on Twitter: "I'm at the gym!"

  • Selfie.

  • How about you go to the gym, do your exercise, and then take a picture after we're sweaty,

  • and then put that on Instagram?

  • And then my favourite people...

  • No, I hate these people: People who talk on the phone when they're working out.

  • I don't know what it is, ladies, you're the worst.

  • I do not want to hear your conversation about anything - I don't care what you're talking

  • about.

  • It is annoying as hell when I'm working out and you're: "Oh my god, nah-nah-nah-nah-nah.

  • [Laughs]."

  • Shut up!

  • You should not be able to have enough breath to speak if you're actually working out at

  • the gym.

  • You should be like: "Ha-ha", out of breath and unable to talk by the end of your routine.

  • So, if you've got enough energy to yap through the whole thing - come on, get that...

  • Get that heartbeat up more, girl.

  • Get off your phone.

  • Concentrate on what you're doing.

  • I'm sure your friend can wait to hear about your new nail polish colour.

  • Mine's coral, by the way.

  • One of the worst...

  • Well, I don't know which is worse, the pig or the skunk.

  • The pig.

  • The pig is dirty.

  • Basically, pigs don't wipe down the machines.

  • So, "wipe down" or "wipe the machines" mean you clean with some kind of a stringent, some

  • kind of liquid after you've used them.

  • So, you're all sweaty, you get your bum...

  • Get some bum sweat on the seat - it's nice to wipe or clean the sweat off of the machine.

  • These people don't do that.

  • And they do what's called ogling.

  • Do you know what "ogle" means?

  • I know it looks like "oogle", I know, but it's not oogle; it's "ogle".

  • "Ogle" means they look at all of the fine ladies working out in the gym.

  • So, for example: Ladies, if you're doing a yoga class, there's always one pig behind

  • who's looking at all the ladies do the downward dog position.

  • He's not really thinking about yoga at this point, but he doesn't really care and he continues

  • to stare.

  • Maybe you like that; I don't know.

  • The skunk.

  • Do you know what a skunk is?

  • A skunk is an animal that smells really bad.

  • So, gyms, for me always smell bad because there's lots of people, they're sweating;

  • it's not a very clean environment.

  • Sometimes it smells like bum, which I'm kind of baffled by.

  • But, basically, a skunk might fart...

  • Yeah.

  • Did you know that word in English: "fart"?

  • And basically they smell bad.

  • It might be because their clothes are moldy.

  • Now, "moldy", it's a very distinct smell.

  • "Moldy" basically means that your clothes have not dried properly and they smell like

  • a wet dishrag.

  • So if you wash your dishes and you: "[Sniffs]."

  • You smell that rag, that's the same smell, except it's now on a person.

  • Some of them even smell like dirty boy parts, and let me tell you, it's the balls.

  • Okay?

  • And I'm just wondering: Do you ever shower?

  • I mean, I know you're sweating, but when we start the class and you come in smelling like

  • balls, I don't know what you're doing at your work, but just maybe some baby powder on those,

  • boy.

  • Something to get the stench away.

  • Next one, the leech.

  • Leech is not as in an animal; it's more like an insect, and basically a leech comes and

  • sticks on you.

  • Now, picture this: It's 4:30 at the gym.

  • There are only two people working out, and you decide to go for a run, and there are

  • six running machines or treadmills.

  • So, you decide to take the treadmill to the far left against the wall and have your own

  • freedom for the day.

  • About five minutes into your running, another person comes into the gym-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-and

  • sees seven empty treadmills.

  • Guess what this person does?

  • Instead of choosing a treadmill far from you, they come to the one exactly right beside

  • you.

  • What the hell are you doing?

  • Do you want to smell