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  • -I'm very excited about this.

  • "IT Chapter 2" comes out this weekend.

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

  • When they heard that, actual clowns were like,

  • "Oh, come on. I was just starting to get work again.

  • I mean, come on." [ Laughter ]

  • Let's get to some news here. I read that President Trump

  • promised that if he's re-elected,

  • he'll build 500 miles of border wall.

  • Yep, and if he's not re-elected,

  • he'll just draw a wall with a Sharpie.

  • [ Laughter ]

  • But this is odd.

  • [ Laughter continues ]

  • "I didn't do it. That's the way the wall was."

  • [ Laughter ]

  • But this is odd right here. The Trump administration

  • just announced that they're rolling back

  • efficiency standards for light bulbs.

  • It was a confusing day at the White House,

  • 'cause every time Trump said "dim bulbs,"

  • Eric and Don Jr. busted in and said, "You rang?"

  • [ Laughter ]

  • "Lock the doors, please."

  • [ Laughter ]

  • Guys, I don't know if you've noticed this

  • but President Trump can have trouble

  • pronouncing words sometimes.

  • For example, here he is trying to say the word "inconvenience."

  • Take a look at this.

  • -Couldn't have been more calm. I then respectfully said,

  • "Sorry to incon-vens-- convenience you,"

  • and I left the room. [ Laughter ]

  • -Well, he's actually struggled with a few other words recently,

  • so with that in mind, it's time to play

  • "Talk Like Trump." Here we go.

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

  • -♪ Talk like Trump

  • Talk like Trump

  • Yeah

  • -So... [ Cheers and applause ]

  • Yeah, you guys look good. Oh, yeah.

  • [ Cheers and applause continues ]

  • Here's how this works.

  • I'm gonna see if anyone can guess

  • how the President is going to mispronounce a simple word.

  • If you get it right, you get a prize.

  • If you get it wrong, you still get a prize.

  • All right. [ Laughter ]

  • Raise your hand if you want to play "Talk like Trump."

  • It's really fun. [ Cheering ]

  • Here we go. Sure, right here.

  • I don't have to walk far. Stand up, sure.

  • Oh, sit down, maybe. [ Laughter ]

  • All right.

  • Hi. What's your name?

  • -Keno. -Keno?

  • -Yeah. -Wow. That's a great name.

  • -Yeah. -I lost a lot of money on you.

  • [ Laughter ]

  • Keno, where are you from? -I'm from Brooklyn.

  • -All right, cool. I was gonna say Vegas.

  • In our first clip, President Trump is gonna

  • try and say the word "heritage."

  • How do you think he's gonna mispronounce "heritage"?

  • -Her-i-tawge? [ Laughter ]

  • -That's pretty good. "Her-i-tawge."

  • [ Laughter ]

  • That's pretty good. Let's see what happened.

  • -And we are reclaiming our noble "herrige" as a nation.

  • -Ah! [ Buzzer ]

  • "Herrige" -- so close. So close.

  • You lost, but here's your losing T-shirt.

  • A custom-made "herrige." That's for you.

  • -Thank you. -Thank you, Keno. Appreciate it.

  • Who else? Who else wants to play?

  • Get up. [ Cheers and applause ]

  • How you doing? -Good. I'm great.

  • -What is your name? -My name's Maya.

  • -Maya, very good. Maya, where are you from?

  • -I'm from Northern Virginia.

  • -Hey, well, thank you for being here, Maya.

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

  • Maya, our next clip, very simple.

  • Trump tries to say the word "lawmakers."

  • How is he going to mispronounce the word "lawmakers"?

  • -Law-mack? [ Laughter ]

  • -"Law-mac." [ Laughter ]

  • I can see that one. I can see that one happening.

  • All right. Let's see what happened.

  • -He has worked in both houses of Congress,

  • advising "law-markers."

  • -Ah! [ Buzzer ]

  • "Law-markers." It's close.

  • Here's your losing "law-markers" T-shirt.

  • -Thank you. -Thank you for playing.

  • I appreciate it. Anyone else?

  • Who's up?

  • You? I don't know how to get to you.

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

  • You, yeah, right there. Yeah, come over here.

  • This guy just...

  • This guy just looks interesting to me.

  • Hey, nice to see you. -Nice to see you, too.

  • [ Laughter ]

  • -What is your name? -My name's Matt.

  • -Hey, Matt, welcome. Where you from?

  • -I'm from the Bronx. Hey, all right!

  • Boogie down, Bronx.

  • Now, in this final clip, Trump tries to say "transplants."

  • "Transplants." -Turnsplints?

  • [ Laughter ] -Turnsplints?

  • -Turnsplinsts. -Turnsplints.

  • You're not saying any vowels at all.

  • [ Laughter ] -No.

  • -Trnsplnts. -Trnsplnts.

  • -You're actually saying it through your nose.

  • -[ Muffled speaking ] -Yeah.

  • [ Muffled speaking ]

  • -In addition, up to 11,000 more Americans

  • could receive heart, lung, and liver transpants annually.

  • -Ah! [ Buzzer ]

  • -"Transpants." Ah, sorry.

  • Thank you for playing. I appreciate.

  • Thank you so much. Appreciate it.

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

  • That was "Talk like Trump." Thanks to our players.

  • Let's get right back to the monologue right here.

  • -♪ Talk like Trump

  • Talk like Trump

  • Yeah

  • -Some 2020 news.

  • The third Democratic presidential debate

  • is in less than a week,

  • and this time, all the candidates can fit on one stage.

  • [ Laughter ]

  • We'll hear from the 10 candidates up there,

  • plus Bill de Blasio shouting from the audience.

  • [ Laughter ]

  • I saw that this debate will be on ABC,

  • which is nice because the winners will get

  • a boost in the polls while the losers

  • will get a spot on "Dancing With the Stars."

  • -Oh. -That's pretty cool.

  • [ Laughter, cheers, applause ]

  • Some tech news. Google is being fined

  • $170 million for violating children's privacy.

  • Pretty messed up. Not only did they collect

  • kids' data, they also told Becky that Greg liked her

  • but didn't "like her" like her.

  • [ Laughter ]

  • And finally, Yellowstone's Steamboat Geyser

  • had a record number of premature eruptions this year.

  • Today, park rangers walked up to it and said,

  • "Don't worry. This happens to lots of geysers."

  • [ Laughter ] We have a great show.

-I'm very excited about this.

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B1 TheTonightShow laughter trump maya applause mispronounce

Trump Administration Rolls Back Light Bulb Efficiency Standards

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    林宜悉 posted on 2020/07/03
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