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  • What's up, my homies?

  • I call you my homies because you're my friends

  • and you're at home.

  • I hope you're all healthy and safe.

  • We are doing well.

  • I enjoy being home.

  • I have loved filming from my house.

  • There are times that I miss being at work.

  • I miss my studio audience.

  • I miss all of you.

  • I miss having guests sit next to me so I can scare them.

  • I also miss the tangy smell of my cue card guy.

  • Today, I decided I am going to try

  • to make my house a little more like the studio.

  • I have Andy--

  • Andy is wandering around back there.

  • I'm here now.

  • Outside of the phone.

  • Oh, you're listening to me?

  • Yes.

  • That's strange.

  • OK.

  • That's new.

  • Andy--

  • I'm trying to pay attention.

  • What show is this?

  • When will this air?

  • This will air today, if people are watching,

  • it's airing right now.

  • OK.

  • He barely works here.

  • OK.

  • I thought there were more ways to make this feel

  • like my studio, so I have this.

  • I had them send me this.

  • And it's a sound effects box.

  • And it's either going to make me feel

  • like I'm back in the studio, or make

  • me sound like a 90s radio DJ.

  • I have all kinds of things here.

  • I have-- Let see.

  • See, this one.

  • That's a good one.

  • That's applause.

  • OK.

  • Oh, it goes for a long time.

  • Yes.

  • All right.

  • And then I have this.

  • Oh, boy.

  • I miss that sound.

  • There's so many songs on a button.

  • There's what?

  • There's this.

  • Those.

  • There's a big crash here.

  • Hold on.

  • That's not it.

  • Doesn't matter.

  • You really got a hold of that thing.

  • Yes.

  • And then I have candles here.

  • They're lit.

  • You get it?

  • Candles.

  • Yes, but they're not lit.

  • I wanted to use the air horn.

  • But they're not lit.

  • They're not lit.

  • It was a joke.

  • Oh.

  • And you want to hear something scary?

  • We found leftovers from before the quarantine in the back

  • of our fridge today.

  • Should we move on with the show?

  • I think that'd be a great idea.

  • OK.

  • I hear the sweet sound of tWitch's voice. tWitch?

  • There he is.

  • Hi, y'all.

  • Hi, tWitch.

  • How's your Sauvignon Blanc?

  • Have you started your Sauvignon Blanc yet?

  • Not today.

  • Not today.

  • But it's been consistent, so I know it's going to be good.

  • OK.

  • All right.

  • Not yet though.

  • All right.

  • We can't be in the same room, but I would really

  • appreciate a dance from you.

  • Let's do it.

  • OK.

  • You going to drop the beat for me?

  • [MUSIC - KENDRICK LAMAR, "BIG SHOT"] Big shot.

  • Hold up, wait.

  • Peanut butter insides.

  • No.

  • Outside, white, but he look like Gentiles.

  • Gentiles.

  • Emotional, 'motional, 'motional, 'motional.

  • Why you emotional?

  • Why you emotional?

  • Ah, you emotional.

  • Yeah.

  • Big shot.

  • Big shot.

  • Hold on.

  • Peanut butter insides.

  • Hold on.

  • Outside, white, but he look like Gentiles.

  • Gentiles.

  • Emotional, 'motional, 'motional, 'motional.

  • Why you emotional?

  • Why you emotional?

  • Ah, you emotional.

  • Yeah.

  • Serve that work for Kung-Fu Kenny.

  • Got juice, got work, got weight, got plenty.

  • Got them, got her, got more, got Benji.

  • Yeah.

  • Top off getting topped-off in the city.

  • Big top dawg and I dance on 'em like Diddy.

  • Pop off and I pop back like Fiddy.

  • Yeah.

  • I hit the ceiling and forgot about the floor.

  • Yeah.

  • Brand so big, got my haters on the ropes.

  • Yeah.

  • This be the wave, plus I live--

  • [APPLAUSE]

  • tWitch, I could watch you do that all day.

  • And the good news is my calendar is open.

  • I can watch you do that all day.

  • I really can.

  • The next time you dance though, do me a favor.

  • I want you to find something random in your house,

  • like a vase, or a lamp, or a kid.

  • And dance with something to surprise me.

  • OK?

  • Got you.

  • Isn't it a vase?

  • I don't know that it's a vase.

  • I think it's a vase.

  • Well, it's a vase if you're fancy.

  • It's a vase if you grew up like I did

  • OK.

  • Yes, and I'm from Alabama, so it's definitely a vase.

  • Yes.

  • Yes.

  • It's like a foyer or a foyer.

  • Yes.

  • You know?

  • Yes.

  • Potato, potato.

  • Got it.

  • tWitch, I'm happy you're here.

  • Andy, how's it going out there?

  • It is raining today, Ellen.

  • At the moment, there is rain.

  • But you do have an overhang, and so I'm benefiting from that.

  • That's great.

  • Yes.

  • I'm glad we have an overhang.

  • At least I can't scare you.

  • You've got to like that.

  • That's true.

  • I've thought about that a number of times,

  • and yet I keep looking because you had sent me

  • those photos two weeks ago of a mountain lion on your property.

  • So I'm constantly looking to see if there's a mountain lion.

  • Listen, if you get hungry, speaking of mountain lions.

  • You know what you should go get before an animal is attracted?

  • There's some nuts over on the rock,

  • and they're for squirrels.

  • But I'd like you to eat them before it

  • attracts another kind of--

  • What?

  • Getting kind of late.

  • There's some nuts.

  • You like nuts, right?

  • Yes, but these-- well, now they're wet nuts.

  • There's nothing worse than wet nuts.

  • [LAUGHTER]

  • Grab a handful of those nuts.

  • I just got the whole nuts thing.

  • Hold on to the wet nuts.

  • You can wash them down with the hose over there if you want.

  • They're probably wet enough that you don't need to.

  • Are you really saying wet nuts and a hose?

  • You said wet nuts.

  • I'm just--

  • [LAUGHTER]

What's up, my homies?

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B1 TheEllenShow vase emotional wet studio blanc

Ellen Makes Her House More Like Her TV Studio

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    林宜悉 posted on 2020/07/03
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