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  • Wow, that is lot of applause.

  • Yeah.

  • Wow.

  • I am almost certain they think we're here to introduce Ellen.

  • I say, well, fortunately for us Ellen isn't here today.

  • So we will be stepping in for her.

  • Today.

  • Yes.

  • [CHEERING]

  • She took the day off because she can,

  • because that's what you can do when you're Ellen.

  • We did not take the day off because we are not Ellen.

  • I wish we were, that kind of money looks fun.

  • It does.

  • I wouldn't know.

  • My name is Eugene.

  • [APPLAUSE]

  • Congratulations.

  • And my name is Dan.

  • [APPLAUSE]

  • This is very fun for us.

  • And shockingly we're related.

  • This is a crazy coincidence.

  • We just happen to be guest hosting the same week

  • that our show, Schitt's Creek, is back

  • for its sixth and final year.

  • Wow.

  • [APPLAUSE]

  • Thank you It's almost as if it was

  • planned by a gaggle of publicists and producers.

  • On the show we play father and son.

  • In real life we play father and son.

  • Yeah.

  • But even though we're related, we don't always

  • see eyebrow to eyebrow.

  • Apologies.

  • What does that mean?

  • So any way.

  • Yeah, no, that was a good one.

  • Yeah.

  • Worked.

  • Since we are father and son, Ellen asked her followers

  • on Twitter if they needed any father and son

  • advice on anything.

  • Which was her first mistake.

  • Nevertheless, we are going to try

  • to answer a few of those questions as best we can.

  • Here's a hint, do the opposite of what we say.

  • So-- oh here.

  • These are the questions.

  • Thank you so much.

  • First question.

  • No, this is it.

  • I don't have a card.

  • That's the card for you.

  • All right here's the first question.

  • Vaughn tweets, I need to be able to play

  • a musical instrument now.

  • Immediately.

  • I'm thinking piano, or maybe the bagpipes.

  • How can I learn instantly?

  • As a millennial, that is the most millennial question

  • I have ever heard.

  • Bottom line, if you want to play the piano,

  • you have to learn how to play the piano.

  • I spent eight years learning how to play the piano,

  • and can't play a single note.

  • Anyway but I like the philosophy,

  • it's like I want to go to Greece next week,

  • can I learn it in a day and a half?

  • Answer, no.

  • No you can't.

  • Hope that helps, Vaughn.

  • All right, here's the next question.

  • What's the next question?

  • Oh hold on, that's for you.

  • That's the one.

  • There it is.

  • Yeah.

  • This is Cameron.

  • Cameron tweets, I work at Little Caesar's pizza.

  • How do I fix that?

  • Why would you ever want to fix that?

  • You work at Little Caesars, that's paradise.

  • I literally once hugged an employee there

  • because they had my pizza ready when I showed up to pick it up.

  • I was also having a bad day, but we hugged nevertheless.

  • Yeah, I don't think your problem is with Little Caesars,

  • the establishment, Cameron.

  • It's with making pizzas.

  • I'd think about maybe Fat Burger.

  • That's not--

  • I'd think about maybe Fat Burger.

  • What is that?

  • I'd think about maybe Fat Burger.

  • Is that how this is going to work?

  • When something just doesn't fly, we'll

  • repeat it 50 times until it does?

  • It beats stopping tape and then having to redo it.

  • You just wait till you get the laugh you want.

  • I want to say that we have time for one more question,

  • but who knows at this point?

  • This one is a little bit more serious.

  • Andy Stanbergs tweets--

  • Oh, I love his show.

  • Stanbergs.

  • Oh, Stanbergs.

  • Yeah.

  • If I were-- if a dog wore pants, would he wear them like this?

  • Or like this?

  • I have a very clear answer in my head,

  • but I'll let you answer first.

  • Well, obviously A is the way you would wear it.

  • That's A.

  • What?

  • A.

  • No.

  • That is absolutely not the right answer.

  • First of all, these are pants.

  • This.

  • I don't know what this is.

  • I don't know how it's staying up.

  • This is the lower half of a dog.

  • Over the legs.

  • All right, you know what?

  • One--

  • These are the legs of the dog.

  • One is--

  • These are the arms.

  • One is sexy, and one is not.

  • Sexy?

  • Sexy?

  • How is that--

  • This is sexy.

  • How is that sexy?

  • This to me is just topless.

  • The dog's wearing a fur top.

  • He has fur.

  • Or she has fur.

  • They have fur.

  • It depends on what you want for your dog.

  • I would love for you to dress from only the front half back

  • from here on out.

  • After the break my dad will be dressing

  • just the back of himself.

  • We could literally argue about this--

  • I've gone topless quite a few times, and it doesn't work.

  • Well, we'll see how the show goes.

  • Hi, I'm Andy.

  • Ellen asked me to remind you to subscribe to her channel

  • so you can see more awesome videos, like videos

  • of me getting scared or saying embarrassing things,

  • like ball peen hammer.

  • And also some videos of Ellen and other celebrities

  • if you're into that sort of thing.

  • Ah!

  • [BEEP] God!

  • [BEEP]

Wow, that is lot of applause.

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Eugene and Dan Levy Give Life Advice to Fans

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    林宜悉 posted on 2020/07/03
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