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  • OK, milk, lemon peel, cinnamon.

  • What y'all making, horchata?

  • Milk, corn starch-- oh, now you're going to thicken it up.

  • Oh, some kind of cream?

  • Maybe it's a pie.

  • OK, and butter.

  • Mm-- wait.

  • Is that the milk?

  • Refrigerate?

  • For what?

  • What?

  • Ah!

  • [LAUGHS]

  • Whats that jelly thing?

  • What you going to do with that?

  • Popsicle stick.

  • Oh!

  • Not no deep fried milk.

  • Ooh.

  • Baby, Maggie Moo is pissed.

  • Ha, ha.

  • OK, what is that for?

  • Girl, this looks like some deep fried Twinkies.

  • You try to practice--

  • Ooh, no, ma'am.

  • No, no, no.

  • Mm-mm.

  • Nasty, nasty.

  • Jiggly, jiggly.

  • Ha, ha.

  • Well, after watching that, y'all know what is coming.

  • It is time for Kalen's Kountertop.

  • And today, I'm making fried mother [BLEEP] milk, baby.

  • [MUSIC PLAYING]

  • We got 16 ounces of milk in this sauce pan.

  • Let me show y'all.

  • Oh, why did I think milk was more heavy than that?

  • Can you see it?

  • Do you see it?

  • Y'all know what milk look like.

  • And I'm going to add a little lemon peel.

  • Now, from video, I got to peel this like this,

  • like a little potato.

  • Oh.

  • Woo!

  • Thank god I've been going to the gym.

  • Jesus.

  • Because that's a tough ass lemon.

  • Where y'all get this lemon from?

  • Bionic lemon.

  • Bam!

  • Ta-da.

  • Like a dollop of Daisy.

  • OK, I'm going to add both of these cinnamon sticks.

  • Does it taste like anything?

  • Wow, it doesn't.

  • Does cinnamon actually not have a taste?

  • Is it all about the aroma?

  • These are questions I need answered.

  • OK, let me bring it in here, put that in there too.

  • Oh, this would be a good candle.

  • Do I just need to add wax to this?

  • So the smell reminds me of hot sex.

  • No.

  • [LAUGHS] Kind of smells like a cookie.

  • Oh, like a snicker doodle mixed with lemon.

  • Now I'm going to put in three ounces of sugar.

  • This three ounces?

  • Now I got to stir it before it start burning.

  • Well, while that's simmering, let

  • me mix the corn starch and the milk here.

  • Oh, we got my more milk.

  • Milk.

  • Is this whole or 2%?

  • Then we're going to put the corn starch in.

  • And corn starch-- it going to get real thick.

  • I put corn star-- oh, [BLEEP].

  • I put corn starch also in my peach cobbler.

  • OK, I'm still worried about this.

  • So I'm going to stir these all at the same time.

  • See?

  • Look, multitasking.

  • I'm a pro whisker.

  • I'm a whisk-taker.

  • [LAUGHS] Now that I mixed the corn starch and the milk

  • together, I will be pouring it into the sauce pan.

  • But I think I'm supposed to take out the lemon and [BLEEP],,

  • right, first?

  • OK.

  • Look at that cooked lemon.

  • And the cinnamon.

  • Now we're going to put this in here with the milk,

  • mix this concoction together.

  • I was told I had to pour it from that side so y'all could see

  • it.

  • Oh, I got to turn the heat up.

  • And we got to stir it till it thickens.

  • It smell good.

  • I ain't never smelled nothing like this before.

  • Maybe Christmas morning.

  • (SINGING) Fa- who- foraze.

  • Fa- who- foraze.

  • Now, apparently, this is supposed to get thick.

  • But guess what it's not doing?

  • Getting thick.

  • I'm thicker than this damn milk.

  • Maybe I need to let it sit.

  • You was in science class, right?

  • You know how atoms work and particles.

  • When you're trying to change a liquid to a solid,

  • it's got to be stable at a certain degree.

  • I don't know if that's true or not.

  • I didn't do too well on the science part on the ACT.

  • That's OK.

  • Because look at me now.

  • Stay in school.

  • Oh, something's happening here.

  • I see some different colors.

  • Uh-oh.

  • Or it could be the corn starch.

  • But I thought I whisked pretty good.

  • Because I'm a whisk-a-teer.

  • Churn, baby, churn.

  • Oh, it is thickening up.

  • Pro tip.

  • The reason why you use corn starch?

  • Because it thickens whatever you put into it.

  • So if you want a thick ass, eat corn starch.

  • Ha, ha.

  • OK, I turned off the heat.

  • And now I'm going to pour it up into this buttered bowl.

  • Thicc-a-licious.

  • Actually, this is great for my pores.

  • I'm getting high off the milk.

  • [LAUGHS]

  • Now we gotta wait till it cools down to room temperature.

  • [YAWNS] Tired.

  • In today's day and age, we actually

  • have a lot of different kind of milk.

  • And we use whole milk today.

  • But there's skim milk.

  • There's 2% milk.

  • There's lactose-free milk.

  • There's whole milk with omega something in it.

  • There is vitamin C milk, vitamin D milk, vitamin E milk.

  • And then when the vegans were born,

  • then we started getting almond milk, oat milk.

  • Then there was a time when folks was

  • trying to get all political about milk.

  • But we still got breast milk.

  • Let me touch it.

  • Yeah, that's room temperature if we was in hell.

  • [LAUGHS]

  • Now let's go put this in the fridge, y'all.

  • I'll see y'all in three hours.

  • I'm going to take a nap while I'm do--

  • Who make this stool?

  • It's all slanted.

  • OK.

  • OK, I'll be right back, y'all.

  • I got to act like I just came from the refrigerator.

  • And voila, here it is, fresh from my frigerator.

  • The good old milk.

  • Wow, it just flopped out of there.

  • I wasn't expecting it to come out that easily.

  • OK, now we're going to cut the milk.

  • Ooh!

  • That's nasty!

  • Oh, this is so fricking gross.

  • Whose idea was this?

  • Y'all really be bored in life.

  • This is a big Popsicle.

  • And I am a little concerned.

  • Insert.

  • There we go.

  • They want us to do the flour first.

  • So here we go.

  • Boom.

  • Oh, damn.

  • Damn.

  • Damn, damn.

  • Damn.

  • I told y'all this was too damn big.

  • Oh, good god almighty.

  • Let's try it out with this one.

  • I have been told to be gentle.

  • I'm going to bring this over here to the egg.

  • I hope the oil's hot enough.

  • This going to take forever.

  • Well, let's see, how does it feel.

  • It's slimy, very jelly-like.

  • Let's break it up.

  • Let's look inside.

  • Well, it sticks.

  • It's landings.

  • So we're going to try and take this thing out to the best

  • that it looks.

  • Wow.

  • This is how y'all season y'all food.

  • That's the only way this going to be good.

  • [SNEEZES] Sorry.

  • This cimmanon sugar made me sneeze.

  • Oh, my god.

  • Y'all, look at this.

  • Mm.

  • It's not terrible.

  • Has very weird consistency.

  • The cinnamon sugar does help.

  • I feel like I wouldn't be able to eat this

  • because it's too slimy.

  • I think Karter would really enjoy this.

  • It may give you a cavity or two.

  • Look, it's a milkshake.

  • Jiggle, jiggle, baby.

  • Well, that was udderly fry-tening.

  • Get it?

  • Udder and fry.

  • OK.

  • [LAUGHS]

  • Comment below to let me know if you tried this fried milk

  • concoction.

  • And also, if you decide to this week,

  • I would love to see you make this yourself and try it.

  • Just send me the video.

  • I would like to see it.

  • But until next time, bye-bye.

  • I probably need to go get some Tums or something.

  • [BLEEP] We're going to stick this Popsicle

  • right in the middle of it.

  • No.

  • I knew y'all did judge me.

  • Don't be mad.

  • Because I'm thiccer than a snicker, baby.

  • [MUSIC PLAYING]

OK, milk, lemon peel, cinnamon.

Subtitles and vocabulary

Operation of videos Adjust the video here to display the subtitles

B2 TheEllenShow milk corn starch starch corn lemon

‘OMKalen’: Kalen Reacts to and Prepares Fried Milk

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    林宜悉 posted on 2020/07/03
Video vocabulary