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  • So, for most of my childhood, I use to look at all of these great people, and I use to think that these guys are born genius, and I am pretty sure that lots of you think the same.

  • And some of you may look at these great people and then at his current situation and probably going to say, "I will never be like these people, these guys are born geniuses."

  • But we often forget that we have already mastered the most difficult tasks of lifetime: learning to walk and talk.

  • If you look at babies, they never decide it's too hard or not worth the effort, they don't worry about making mistakes or humiliating themselves, they walk, they fall, they get up again and they keep doing it until they make it.

  • So, some of us keep learning in that way but most of us, once we grow little bit and learn how to evaluate our selves we start being afraid of challenges or not being smart.

  • So, here are some ideas from the book that I really find helpful.

  • Successful people learn; unsuccessful people try to prove themselves.

  • What most people try to do is that they always try to prove to people that they are right.

  • I mean every argument they go into, they must make sure that they are right even though that they are not.

  • And then when they start losing the argument, they have to justify themselves in anyway, like one of my friends says "I am right not because of what I say but because I am so and so."

  • That's the mindset of unsuccessful people.

  • But what the successful person is going to say “I don't have to prove my self to anyone, I just need to keep learning”.

  • "I mean I can learn from anyone and I can be wrong."

  • "It does not matter, I still can learn."

  • Successful people keep getting smarter; unsuccessful people pretend to be smart.

  • This is one of my favorites.

  • So during the class, what happen to most of the students is that if they don't understand something, they keep quite because they don't want to look dumb.

  • I mean they have this kind of mentality, “If I ask something, people are going to know that I did not understand, therefore they are going to think that I am dumb.”

  • It may sound weird but that's most people do.

  • But the successful people don't waste time pretending to be smart, they know that, no one is born smart or genius and people get smarter by learning.

  • So they are most likely to going to ask if they don't understand something.

  • Successful people look for challenges to improve themselves; unsuccessful people look for weak to show off themselves.

  • So, They offered four-year-olds a choice: they could redo an easy puzzle or they could try a harder one.

  • Children those who believed in fixed traitsstuck with the safe one.

  • They said things like "kids who are born smart don't do mistakes."

  • On the other side, children who believed you could get smarter thought it was a strange choice.

  • They said things like, "why would anyone want to keep doing the same puzzle over and over?"

  • So, they chose harder one.

  • You might also be saying the same thing, but most of us are with fixed mindset.

  • I mean, if we are comfortable to do something in a certain way, we are going to stick to it for the rest of our life.

  • And if we ever try something new, the moment we start facing challenges, we are like "oh that's not for me."

  • We can't even spend 20 minutes a day to read a book to stay mentally stable, and then we ask for some kind of little trick on how to be successful.

  • So, these are my favorite ideas from the book "mindset" by Carol Dweck.

So, for most of my childhood, I use to look at all of these great people, and I use to think that these guys are born genius, and I am pretty sure that lots of you think the same.

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Mindset: The New Psychology of Success by Carol Dweck

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    doris.lai posted on 2020/09/09
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