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- I know we're gonna come out of this all okay.
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We're a lot stronger than we think we are.
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(upbeat music)
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Hi, everyone.
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Michael Franzese here.
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I'm sure many of you are familiar with me on Buzzfeed.
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I've done a number of things,
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former caporegime, Colombo family in New York.
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But what many of you may not know
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is that I spent a lot of time in solitary confinement.
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I actually spent 29 months and seven days in the hole,
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a six-by-eight cell, 24/7.
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And people, I gotta tell ya, that's not easy.
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Now why I think this is appropriate to talk about today,
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obviously, many of us are being confined or quarantined,
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we can't leave our homes,
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and some of us are really struggling with that.
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But let me give you some good advice,
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and let me tell you what I went through.
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Many of you know that I walked away from that life,
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and you can't do that.
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So there was a contract on my life,
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people were pretty upset with me,
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and I was actually in solitary, they alleged,
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for my own protection.
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In addition to that, the government was trying very hard
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to get me to cooperate against my former associates,
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and I refused to get on the stand,
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and as punishment, basically,
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when they put me back in prison, they kept me in solitary.
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Being in solitary, being alone,
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not able to look at television, no internet,
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I would get the newspapers five or six days later
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after they would come out.
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The worst enemy I had was my clock.
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I didn't want to know what time it was.
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Every day was pretty much the same.
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There was no differentiating the days,
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and sometimes, the only time I knew
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that the day was different was by the food
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that they gave us.
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There was a time there when I thought
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I might spend the rest of my life in that hole.
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And I'll be honest with you, that was pretty scary.
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It was pretty rough thinking that, this was it.
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Fortunately, we're not in that situation.
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And I'm gonna give you some tips,
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some things that you might do
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that I did when I was in solitary
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that might help you pass the time and get you through it.
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If I didn't have books to read,
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I don't know how I would have made it, honestly.
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My wife sent me in over 400 books,
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and anything that I'd get my hands on, I would read.
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Fictions, nonfictions, novels,
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anything that kinda just took me out of that hole.
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It was important, because when you read,
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it takes you out of the place that you're in.
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You kinda get involved in the story
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and you get immersed in it,
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and you stop thinking of your surroundings.
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So read as much as you possibly can.
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I'm not telling you to read the newspaper
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and go online and read all of the stuff that's on there.
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Read books.
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Don't be glued to your television set.
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We're looking at the news 24/7, some of us.
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We hear conflicting reports.
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We hear bad reports.
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We hear people coming down with the virus.
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Get your information, and then get away from it.
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You don't want this to bring you down day in and day out.
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Listening to the news every day is not gonna change it.
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Be informed, know what's going on,
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but don't divulge an over-appetite on the news.
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Not good.
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On the internet, a lot of false information
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is going around there.
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Don't panic over information that you're getting on the Web.
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Make sure the source is proper,
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and just do what you're told,
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and that's how we'll get through this thing.
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Exercise, get your body fit, very important.
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When I tried to keep myself going, I mean, I exercised.
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I did pushups.
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I did sit-ups.
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I did chin-ups when I was able to.
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You don't have to have a gym in your house.
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You don't have to have weights and so on and so forth.
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You can improvise.
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But if you have 'em, use 'em.
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A lot of times, you got 'em in the house
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and you don't use 'em.
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You got 'em, use 'em.
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Exercise, get your body fit, very important.
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For some of us that are not in great shape,
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this might be a good time to get that diet right.
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You know, when I was in the hole,
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I'll be honest with you,
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I lost, I think, 20 some odd pounds.
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Four times I got food poisoning
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from different things that they served.
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So I stopped eating a lot of stuff in there.
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I actually survived on cereal, bananas, and Cup-A-Soup,
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anything that was packaged that I would trust and eat.
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If you're confined to the house, you can eat properly.
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You don't get the right foods.
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This is the time to do it and focus on it,
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and really make that something important.
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It's your own personal body.
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It's your own health.
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You should do that.
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Think of things to do around the house
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that you never had a chance to do.
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You know me?
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My office.
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I finally, we just moved into this home
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a little less than a year ago,
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and I still had boxes that I hadn't emptied out yet
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and I hadn't looked at.
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Well, we now have a chance to do that.
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Things that you never thought you were able to do,
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you had no time to do, now's a good time.
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One of the things that I've found so comforting
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was really listening to music.
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Music can be so uplifting.
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When I had that Sony Walkman and I had that earphones,
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I mean, they just took me out of the cell
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for quite some time.
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I'll never forget, one of the most difficult times in prison
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and especially in solitary, in the hole,
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was during the holidays.
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You're thinking about your family.
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It's a tough time in there.
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You're all alone.
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It's like every day is the same,
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but you do know it's a holiday.
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I'll never forget, one Christmas Eve,
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I was honestly pretty depressed.
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I mean, you're young and you get depressed,
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and I was just laying down on my bed,
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and I had my earphones on,
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and a song came out that I'll never forget.
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♪ Mary's boy child Jesus Christ ♪
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- "Mary's Boy Child."
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And for some reason, that song just uplifted me that night.
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I started thinking about positive things,
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and it just helped me get through the night
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and actually through to Christmas Day.
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So music can be a great, great source of encouragement,
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so put those earphones on.
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Get some quiet time by yourself.
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Some of you have kids running around the house, I know.
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But get some quiet time and listen to some uplifting music.
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Boy, I'm telling you, it really helps.
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It was 25 years ago that I was released from prison,
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but, I mean, when I think about it,
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it becomes so vivid to me,
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I can put myself back in that cell in a second
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when I close my eyes and I think about it.
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You know what was the worst thing for me?
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Worrying about what my family was doing every day.
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I'll tell you one thing that happened.
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At midnight every night,
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I used to get the phone just for a minute.
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Well, one night, I get that phone,
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and I looked forward to that so much to talk to my wife,
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see what my kids were doing,
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and my father-in-law picks up the phone,
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and I said, "What's happening?
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"Where's Connie?"
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And he said, "The kids are in trouble.
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"She had to take them to the emergency room,"
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and then the phone shut off.
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It shut off.
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I couldn't call back.
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I had no idea what happened.
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I didn't know if there was an accident.
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It was the worst 24 hours of my life
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until I was able to get to the phone
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at midnight the following night.
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They were fine.
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But that 24 hours, people, I wanted to die.
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I really mean that,
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'cause I thought maybe I lost my family.
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I didn't know what would happen.
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It wasn't till maybe I was halfway through it
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that I started to feel,
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okay, maybe I really am gonna get out of this situation.
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But we have it good today, people.
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Confinement or quarantine in the house
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is not as bad as we might think it is, trust me.
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I'll admit, we've never been through
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anything like this before.
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I certainly don't remember anything like this
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in my lifetime, but you gotta get yourself uplifted
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and encouraged, and you gotta know
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that we're gonna get through this thing.
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So hopefully, I've been a little bit of an encouragement
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to you.
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Again, if I got through 29 months and seven days
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in solitary, a six-by-eight cell, 24/7,
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nothing around me, I know we're gonna come out of this
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all okay.
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We're a lot stronger than we think we are.