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  • parents are supposed to be the ones you

  • can depend on during down times and look

  • to for guidance unfortunately many

  • parents say emotionally harmful things

  • that can have a lasting negative

  • psychological effect this isn't in the

  • out-of-date phenomenon just ten years

  • ago the number of children living in

  • such an environment was approximately

  • 55,000 as noted by the program prevent

  • child abuse America considering that

  • young people have nothing to compare

  • their treatment with they often think

  • that this toxic behavior is normal or

  • even expected the alarming conclusion is

  • that they can't ask for help because

  • damage sets in if they don't realize

  • it's needed in this follow-up to our

  • eight toxic things parents say we

  • explore some more things to look out for

  • if you think your parents are toxic ever

  • hear the phrase don't take it personally

  • well this time those insults are very

  • personal and it's from the parents the

  • first video in this series details a few

  • of these personal attacks yet there are

  • so many more types some more of these

  • hurtful and offensive words include one

  • you look terrible you know that phrase a

  • face only a mother could love it means

  • that parents should be supportive of

  • your appearance so when a child is image

  • shamed by them insecurities skyrocket

  • the open possibilities of what this

  • statement means explode in the child's

  • mind and could lead to core body issues

  • in the future too you're a freak saying

  • this gives the message that they are not

  • only ill-fitting to the world in general

  • but unaccepted lee so it also implies

  • that there's something wrong with who

  • they are as a person and they have no

  • choice but to be negatively abnormal in

  • some way

  • three you're still immature if this was

  • the response you received from a parent

  • after requesting something or

  • participating in a discussion with a

  • parent what's the emotion you read or

  • felt behind that phrase is it discussed

  • is it ridicule is it shame this implies

  • that the child is wrong or off like

  • they're undeveloped and inferior no one

  • has the right to shame you for your

  • likes dislikes or non-harmful actions

  • there are also many instances of parents

  • using words of neglect which are another

  • form of toxic comments such as poor I'm

  • gonna send you to boarding school how

  • many times has it been shown in movies

  • or shows where a parent or step parent

  • says this answer far too many sadly this

  • is the case of art imitating life yes

  • parents do say these things to their

  • actual children saying that they're

  • gonna send you away communicates that

  • they don't love you enough to want you

  • around and they don't want to guide you

  • or raise you five once you're 18 I'm

  • kicking you out reaching the age of

  • majority which is most common at 18

  • technically marks the legal beginnings

  • of adulthood so when a parent says this

  • it gives rise to feelings of guilt

  • the almost adult often feels like

  • they're a burden and that maybe things

  • would be better for the family if they

  • left there are also manipulative

  • comments which are also toxic

  • manipulation is defined as exerting

  • shrewd or devious influence especially

  • for one's own Vantage some examples are

  • six this is your fault a parent placing

  • blame on their child and acting

  • victimized causes the child to feel like

  • a burden or even a curse this can lead

  • to them going to great lengths to avoid

  • being a so-called problem maybe even

  • enslaving themselves to maintain

  • acceptance

  • vii show me some respect it's certainly

  • important for people to give respect

  • where it's due

  • however there are limits if a parent or

  • elder are toxic being commanded to

  • respect such behavior just because

  • they're older is confusing this also

  • sends a message that once you get to a

  • certain age it's okay to behave in a

  • disreputable or unethical manner because

  • other people should respect you no

  • matter what just because you're older

  • the adult in this case is betting on the

  • youth unquestioningly being respectful

  • without need for a reason allowing the

  • adult full control critical thinking and

  • questioning can help the child out of

  • this if they have proper guidance other

  • toxic comments come in the form of

  • controlling words such as 8 do what I

  • say or else this is an outright threat

  • this dismisses the child's independent

  • needs and desires leaving them feeling

  • unworthy of anything other than

  • following the parents whims this brings

  • us now to criticism and not the

  • constructive kind overly critical

  • statements of our skills or abilities

  • are common and detrimental statements

  • like 9 you are terrible at sports one

  • can substitute the word sports for any

  • hobby or activity taken up by the child

  • this makes the child's of conscious

  • about their skills which can turn to

  • anxiety the grading performance further

  • and eventually even replacing the

  • association of enjoyment of the activity

  • with tension and fear

  • which brings us to ten you're the worst

  • student even though many of us tend to

  • be aware that there is always someone

  • better than us it's quite the downer to

  • hear from our parents the implications

  • that there's no one worse than us these

  • types of remarks can feel like a

  • confirmation of the receivers negative

  • self thoughts especially when were

  • younger we tend to trust our parents

  • above all others so being confirmed by

  • them as the worst definitely contributes

  • to low self-esteem and feelings of being

  • generally undeserving many of these

  • toxic things parents say are more than

  • just poisonous hot air

  • they're also verbal abuse we're in a

  • pattern of behavior is used to maintain

  • power and control over another

  • therefore it's particularly important to

  • be aware of what qualifies as toxic if

  • either of your parents ever said

  • anything like this to you do you know

  • anyone whose parents frequently speak

  • this way if you're curious and want to

  • know more about toxic family dynamics

  • check out our other videos related to

  • this subject the links are in the

  • description below we'll see you in the

  • next video and as always thanks so much

  • for watching

  • you

parents are supposed to be the ones you

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B1 US toxic child parent respect adult gonna send

10 Toxic Things Parents Say To Their Kids

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