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  • once upon a time in a land far, far away.

  • There was a She wasn't a princess by fairy deal standards, but she lived in a good house with spans on a generally happy childhood.

  • The only problems with her childhood never occurred.

  • 200 much later at Bodine, she met her first love.

  • A boy called Sam promised, Oh, perfection, the sun and the stars in the entire galaxy but most importantly, promised her that she would be happy, have you than ever before.

  • When she would get upset, he would show pictures of all the beautiful things they could have on.

  • She would be okay for a while, but then she would get upset again because why she was promised these things.

  • Whole wishes were never granted.

  • That's the weird thing.

  • Oh, that's weird things up from being promised perfection.

  • It's a goal we said for us, a goal we can never attain because it's the biggest lie we conduct.

  • Now we all know that any relationship build on false promises and lies this toxic.

  • But if the government has a long time to realize this longer than it should have longer than she's Browder in the duration of the relegation trip, which last about a year sound started demanding she be happy, but only if you did it the Sam way.

  • She wasn't okay with that.

  • So I started speaking up more standing up for herself, choosing to make herself happy instead of relying on Sam's unattainable standards because she knew that it was a beautiful lie, which she would never achieve perfection.

  • So she ended it with Sam, nor your ideal love story, huh?

  • However, in the wake of a toxic relationship, the princess grew and thrived.

  • She became smarter, more conscious, more aware.

  • Where are all the things around?

  • Deeply, not outrightly.

  • She felt proud, confident all the thing Sam told her she would never feel.

  • This is a story I think most of you can relate to.

  • Maybe you're still in that toxic fears.

  • A little confused, well replaced with your body image Makes more sense.

  • Now let me cut to the chase because I can keep telling the story of this little girl Oregon value.

  • Mind the catch.

  • That the same thing.

  • Replace Tom with my body image on dhe.

  • I was that girl.

  • I'm a lot of things now, but perfect.

  • Still isn't one of them.

  • What I am, though, as I would like to believe is a story.

  • Del Oh, so good morning, ladies and gentlemen.

  • My name is National guru and I'm going to be telling you a story.

  • A story about a search for perfection a soldier always left on fulfilled a search that always left me feeling rather empty inside.

  • But a search that was supposed to leave me feeling joyous, a lot ecstatic, elated.

  • I was that little golden sword for something perfect something to a spy or two on something to look for a look upon.

  • I was on confident.

  • I didn't feel strong or happy or powerful.

  • Like all the goals in the media.

  • I felt weak about unconfident.

  • So that picture that's me at 14 feeling that exact way.

  • I wanted to put that feeling into a number, but unfortunately I was too conscious to ever checked the scale.

  • Do haunted by the idea that the number wouldn't be perfect.

  • And then along came the idea of wanting to be been on.

  • Boy, I loved it.

  • The idea had been hanging on for yours in green and every morrow ingrained in my sub consciousness.

  • all of marketing and everybody would fill My Overwatch told me that the happiest people was in.

  • So to be happy, I'd have to be thin dough.

  • This idea was so appealing at forced on I was so in love with it, so deluded by the idea that one day I on my body, good at the end, the spigot of perfection, the state of ultimate happiness, when I would get upset that I wasn't looking perfect.

  • This idea what claw its way back into my mind.

  • And I would find myself looking at pictures of models and actresses on the screen, all the convincing myself that I one day could look like this and be happy one day and then one day became this side on goal that gripped me.

  • So this picture, that's me the next summer at age 15 I still don't think I looked perfect, but I look much closer to it than the year before.

  • But why?

  • No, this idea of perfection didn't dissuade me from eating well and eating healthy.

  • I would still eat my fries and doughnuts just less with more control.

  • The biggest Jans Woz that I fell in love with walking out.

  • Ironically, inspired by a video off a model work, we're talking about the importance of working out.

  • I started it to when you want to be happy, do Was he already happy?

  • Say right?

  • I left a soft balls of the treadmill, the home of the elliptical and the let's get fit atmosphere of the gym.

  • But despite everything, I was still doing this with the motivation of wanting to be thin, to be perfect.

  • You know how I know that?

  • Because while I looked visibly more confident, I was still too scared to step on a scale still do, haunted by the idea that I wouldn't be both fact, the fairy tale was fashion alive, forever growing in my mind.

  • I stayed in that mindset for a long time, longer than I'm proud.

  • Off to be thin was to be both fact, and by extension on, the only way to be happy was to be perfect.

  • After all, come on, How could Katrina gaffer Selena Gomez always be smiling within dough?

  • The real Jane trapping the fourth day I picked up a weight was a four kg dumbbell, which, with with with which I was going to do some form of leg exercise number, which what I do remember was feeling strong, bow off undefeatable.

  • And then, of course, came post.

  • Jim's torn us.

  • I didn't feel quite as powerful then, let me tell you.

  • But I thrive.

  • I pushed my body more and more a creative the rental in when I crave the relevant rush that came with it, the stairs you got at the gym when you were going, loading to any care deeply.

  • It's under both sides.

  • For Bob.

  • It pushed me to be thin, but not the only earth in a strong, thin.

  • I'm still that same goal.

  • I was at 14 just not looking for the validation of being thin.

  • Now the validation of being strong.

  • I love it thoroughly the feeling of being comfortable in your skin.

  • Most of the time it's on barrel.

  • It's on battle to the excitement you feel when you see that you've lost weight or that your legs, you know, because we realize that it doesn't matter.

  • The boy's no demands.

  • Why did I want to be thin At some point and everyone's lives?

  • They wonder about the wheat.

  • It happens, overweight or underweight, just muscle malls on fat.

  • Everyone, we're all in thought off the right number and spoiler.

  • Spoiler alert.

  • There's no right number.

  • A quick question.

  • Can we have a show of hands I run in?

  • The audience was aged 18 or younger.

  • That's a lot of people on.

  • I find it very hard to believe that all a few way would stand only healthy because, according to the World Health Organization, all individuals under each of all under all individuals on the 18 years of age should weigh 60 cages or below, whether you over or what they are under.

  • At some point you've looked on their body, looked at a picture of a model.

  • Answer.

  • I want to look like that.

  • Social media, as usual, is demonized for popularizing this.

  • Want to be thin?

  • But what we realized is that we consciously consumed the at this information will watch the Victoria's Secret fashion show what started the Prussians instagram to marvel at his biceps or what you do deeds box.

  • What did you need books to get to Jeez, abs on.

  • Then we wonder why we want to be thin.

  • We so consciously injustice standards and then subject ourselves to them while ago, I decided to make a change.

  • I unfollowed every modern, every posting on my instagram that made me want to have that body.

  • It made my feet kind of boring.

  • It felt empty.

  • And that's when I realized just how much of this information I consume on a daily basis.

  • Off course, I want to be sin.

  • I keep seeing a picture off camera Jell O in a Calvin Klein bikini in a photo that is undeniably photo shop with millions of comments under it Sing, Wish I Have that Bored with You have different emerges on that note.

  • Even the pictures we see online are so thoroughly edited.

  • Kim K's body is not shaped by Hook or Sutton or fat loss lollipops.

  • It's shaved by a Drina off very expensive dietician on an even more expensive gym.

  • On following celebrities like that, people who promote these agents to make you rapidly lose weight.

  • It helped I now follow celebrities from shows that I like figures who travel lord to explore the world and kind of funny Mima cones.

  • It hopes every small step you tick helps.

  • I stopped reading articles about what contributes to weep.

  • Gain on stopped watching workout videos genetically, Stian Gold's telling me that I needed to cut out all kinds and fats.

  • I didn't want to eat boy loads for every meal.

  • And so I didn't No one ever has to.

  • I now eat healthy, sustainable meals that keep me food.

  • Instead of becoming thin, I chose to become healthy.

  • Like I said, somehow that's more satisfying way to make me feel strong.

  • More in control for friends of mine football Does that or cycling or yoga or Bill Adi's air reading a good book?

  • Feeling's wrong is not about the thing you do it's about.

  • It's about how the thing you do makes you feel and the end goal.

  • What do you want?

  • To feel thin is not a feeling.

  • It's just an objective.

  • And our objective that go that clouds all of our minds and court takes over our lives.

  • But an objective nevertheless, at some point in the store, this must have crossed your mind.

  • It's very easy for you to stand up there, having done all of a resort on having lost all this weight to talk about this.

  • She's thin, so of course he's going to tell me that it doesn't matter.

  • Is it possible to actually be warm?

  • Is it actually, Is it possible to actually get rid of this one to be thin without becoming thin?

  • Theon.

  • So pretty much, yeah, look at icons like Natasha the old Dad speak Oh, Billy Graham or even Liz Oh, who are not Finn by any means, but are living their lives truly on Holy It's gone.

  • So keeping projected doors that thin is beautiful and beautiful list in a toxic cycle not only perpetrated by social media but also by our mindset.

  • Once we change our own mindsets and the way we look at ourselves, we can change the end goal of what we want to look like.

  • Let's stop asking relatives about their weed at family gatherings.

  • Let's stop asking random people in the lift how they lost so much because trust me, it happens.

  • Let's stops so delighted when we see all you've lost so much.

  • Unless we know that that was the intention or even better.

  • Let's store point out people's physical appearances when we meet them.

once upon a time in a land far, far away.

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B1 thin perfection happy promised goal toxic

The Sickness of Thinness | Aashana Daru | [email protected]

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    林宜悉 posted on 2020/03/31
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