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Welcome to...
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How to correctly use a computer.
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A beginner's guide to proper computing.
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Start by taking a seat at your desk.
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Sit up straight.
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Focus on only one task at a time.
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And always keep your workstation clean and tidy.
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Treat your computer with respect.
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It is not a toy.
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Do not touch the screen.
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To send an electronic document, you'll need to print, sign, scan, attach, then send.
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Your computer comes with a standard arrow cursor.
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You must stay within reach of a Wi-Fi signal.
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It does not have a camera.
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To connect one, refer to your instruction manual.
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And keep it out of reach of children.
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You have now learned the basics of computing.
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Follow these instructions precisely and enjoy using your computer correctly.
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[Your next computer is not a computer.]